What questions are asked to a newcomer in the zone? This is a terrible word registration

18.04.2019

Many young men indulge in sodomy, lining up in a row, one after the other. Each one pleases the one in front, while he himself is pleased by the one standing behind. The question is which one of them is happy in to a greater extent than the others?

There are two chairs. On one the peaks are chiseled, on the second the dicks are jerked off. Which one will you sit on? Which mother will you sit on? I'll take the sharpened peaks, cut off the jerked dicks.

You fell into a hole. There's a pie and a dick in the pit. What will you eat, what will you shove up your ass? I'll take the pie and crawl out of the hole.

The prisoner sits on the shkanar, they open the feeder and give gruel and dry bread, in the morning they open the robot and see bones. Question: where do the bones come from if the prisoner is alive? dice

There were two old men, one was fucked before lunch, and the other after lunch, who was worse? Who already has worse old people's problems

They draw a football goal on the wall and a ball on the floor. They say to score a goal. What will you do? Give me a pass

You are riding a train, chained to the levers, and you can turn left or right, since there is a fork ahead. Here on one road there is a pillar and your mother is chained to it, but on the second there are your kents, about 10 people. Who will go where? Today kent, tomorrow cop

A fork in the eye or in the ass? I don't see any one-eyed people here

You're flying on a parachute, there's a sea of shit on the left, a forest of dicks on the right. Where are you planning? In every forest there is a clearing, in every sea there is an island.

Go into the hut, they throw a broom at you with the words “Play something on the guitar.” Your actions? Shove him with his foot and say, “Are you in the mood?”

Will you fuck me or sell your mother? Ass is not for sale, mother is not for sale.

They show the domino tile "six-five". What will you choose? line between 5 and 6

They break the bottle and say “sew it up.” You have to answer inside out.

Play the battery like a boyan. Fan the furs

People come to the market every day and every time buy 3 (three) sticks, no more, no less. One day the salesman got interested and asked: Why do you always buy 3 (three) stickers? He (seller) received the answer: 1 (one) one sticky cake I will lend. I’ll pay off my debts with one little thing. I eat one sticky cake myself... Can you solve the mystery?

You and Kent are walking through the Sahara Desert. At a distance of 100 kilometers there is no housing, no settlements, no one and nothing but sand. Suddenly a poisonous snake crawls out, rushes at Kent and bites him on the penis. What to do? Today a kent, tomorrow a cop. If his butt is above his knee, then the snake will not reach there. And if it’s lower, then he can suck himself off.

If I put a dick to your back, will you fly like a bird? A dick is not wings, I am not a bird, and I am not fit to fly.

What will you eat - soap from the table or bread from the bucket? The table is not a soap dish, the bucket is not a bread bin.

There are categories of prisoners who do not have to undergo the initiation procedure. These include seemingly inadequate or sick individuals, men over 40 years of age. This process reached its apotheosis from the 30s to the 90s of the 20th century. To be thieves or not to be thieves - that is the question. During registration, a “friendly” dialogue takes place, in which Special attention are occupied by tricky riddles.

All you need to do sometimes is remove the camera and pay a general fee.

No one will force you to participate in dark affairs.

But from such an Olympus you can be demoted if:

be overly intrusive and curious,
“rafting” - that is, stealing from one’s own.
leak information to operatives,

Advice: Golden Rule registration - the truth and only the truth.

- using some offensive actions to provoke the newcomer into retaliatory actions;

- see how he will react to them;

- if he does not react as expected, automatically classify him as a six, whose role is cleaning the cell, preparing food, sleeping on the floor, etc.

Center for the Advancement of Criminal Justice Reform

2.5.
The right house

Nowadays, in general, registration for newcomers is less often arranged than before. Especially in a normal cell.

- What other procedures are there in a normal cell?

You don't owe anything to anyone.

Nothing can be taken away from you - this especially applies to rations “from the owner”. And even asking you for something is considered dishonest.

— By the way, about “Gentlemen”.

Is it true that a tattoo is a prisoner's passport?

Are they made by force?

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Prison and life behind bars

when you are free and most valuable,

when you lose it

This is a terrible word registration

Checking for lice

In short, risky, brave people with a king in their heads can trample the zone without any problems. Many people cannot do this. As they say, you can’t stop anyone from living with curly hair.

But not everyone can, some people have points.

One more thing. Today when market relations They also penetrated the walls of the prison; there are cases when first-timers paid off their registration by contributing several thousand dollars to the common fund.

Registration is an important prison ritual.

Its rules have evolved over decades, and a person entering the cell for the first time can be intimidating.

“The second part of the Marlezon ballet”

Although in life he was a harmless eccentric.

There are many of these in the zone, but, as a rule, they all end very poorly.

As in the zone they enter the hut.
Prison registration.

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The pug explains how to the first mover to enter the hut correctly

The pug explains how to the first mover to enter the hut correctly

Former thief in law enters the hut

Former thief in law enters the hut

What a newcomer should not do in prison

What a newcomer should not do in prison

Registration in prison thieves fighter

Registration in prison thieves fighter

What does it mean when there is a Thief in Law in prison?

What does it mean when there is a Thief in Law in prison?

They say - never say no to money or prison. Any of us can - either for a minor offense or by accident - end up in a cell. For a few hours or for a few months. And this place is difficult. You can get minor damage or major troubles there in a couple of minutes and with a few extra words.

These tips are not intended for professional criminals. They themselves give advice to anyone. For example, in the early eighties, a group of people were engaged in “dispersal” (under the guise of police officers, they conducted “searches” of factory workers and “seized surpluses”). When they were arrested by KGB officers, the “policemen” spun something about treason to the Motherland. Charges under this article were not even brought forward - it quickly became clear that this was a lie. But people got the opportunity, instead of the smelly dungeons of the pre-trial detention center, to sit in warm cells of the internal KGB pre-trial detention center. And they didn’t communicate with “shitty cops,” but with KGB investigators in ties. And they didn’t eat gruel...

First of all, decide for yourself how long you will have to sit. Options - 3 days, 10 days, a month, before trial (for us - from several months to several years), term according to the verdict. A lawyer can help you with this. Having assessed the circumstances of the case, he must honestly outline the prospect.

The fewer people you meet on your prison journey, the better. It is advisable to avoid unnecessary meetings - with “frostbitten” criminals or minors (which is much worse), chamber agents, etc. Loneliness is isolation.

First, you can come to an agreement with the investigators. You can ask, but that's up to you.

The prisoners are sitting in a cell. They brought them food. One prisoner hesitated and the rat stole his rations. Without thinking twice, he takes the shoe and throws it at the rat. He hit and killed.

The godfather looked at dead rat and says:

You are a thief, I am a thief, a rat stole bread - that means he is also a thief. So that means you’re like... I give you until the morning, if you don’t come up with an excuse, we’ll drop it.

The man thought and thought, did not sleep all night, and in the morning he answered:

Yes, I’m a thief and you’re a thief, a rat stole bread - that means he’s also a thief, so why would she want to sit with us or something...

Secondly, you can go on a hunger strike. Don't be afraid - going on a hunger strike for several days has never harmed anyone. All actions of this kind must be documented, signed by officials. And the higher the position of the person who signs your application, the better. The minimum is a supervising prosecutor. But it wouldn’t hurt to send such a statement higher - right up to the Prosecutor General. You need to act through a lawyer. Many people, having signed your declaration of hunger strike, will send him “to the bucket.” Do not go on a “dry” hunger strike (refusing food and water). This is detrimental to health, but for business there is no benefit.

Thirdly, you can “sacrifice” your health. There are diseases the diagnosis of which is long and difficult. For example, coronary heart disease... You will need to be transferred under the supervision of a doctor. Or they may even release you completely. It is unlikely that an ordinary person imprisoned on a minor charge, who has not attended prison “universities” or does not have a higher medical education, should feign mental illness. They will quickly expose you.

Fourthly, there is unconventional way. You can confidentially whisper to the investigator that, for example, you have the impression that your cellmate intends to encroach on your honor. And you may not be able to resist and solve this issue radically - for example, by strangling it. Ask them not to say anything to the operators. 99% - you will be transferred alone.

Let’s assume that your detention was not limited to three days and your period of detention was extended to 10 days, or even up to a month.

If you have already gone on a hunger strike, you need to decide what to do next. A long fast will not do any good. You can interrupt your hunger strike and then declare it again, following the same rules.

But suppose you were “evicted” from solitary confinement - you broke your hunger strike or the illness “did not go away”. It is preferable to sit in a “small place” (sparsely populated cell). If you are lucky and your neighbors in such a cell will be robbers, emergency workers, etc., you can serve the entire term without any “registration”, harassment, “divorce”, etc.

As I already said, this article is not intended for professional criminals. And the common person should know that proper relationships with the investigator and the detectives are very important.

If you behave normally with them, then your chances of getting into the “small place” are greater. Let's assume that nothing worked out for you and you were placed in a common cell (30-40 people), filled with criminals. Despite the fact that during perestroika, newspapers made money by describing the horrors that await a person entering a cell for the first time, in fact, no one is particularly thirsty for your blood. But if there is a “tail trailing” behind you in the form of information that you have “turned over” your friends to the operas, have committed a crime that is not liked in prison (rape, child molestation, etc.), then you may have to not sweet. If everything is clean, then you can run into trouble mainly through your own fault.

If a homosexual is caught on camera, it is better to say so directly. In this case, he will sleep and eat with the “roosters”, but the attitude towards him will be different from the attitude towards the “roosters” who earned their status due to “wrong” behavior.

Anyone entering the cell must undergo registration. People over 40 years of age and those who are obviously ill will most likely not be forced to do it. An elderly person should immediately declare that he is “determined to be a man” (that is, he will work, and if required, pay into the “common fund”). It is unlikely that he will be forced to participate in thieves' affairs. True, you can drop out of the “men” - with a demotion. If, for example, you steal from your own people (“rafting”), talk too much, get caught having connections with opera houses, etc.

There are cases when registration was paid off for several thousand dollars - through a lawyer.

“Registration” is actually a formal interrogation in order to determine what kind of person “came to us.” This is understandable - people who are going to spend some time in the same room do not want unnecessary problems. For example, they can - without knowing it - eat at the same table with the “rooster” for a week or two. And this is fraught with trouble for authorities.

When registering - and in a cell in general - there is one main rule: you need to tell the truth. If a person committed rape and said that he was slandered, they may believe him. But if it turns out that he did deceive his cellmates, then they will not forgive him for this.

"Registration" is a ritual. Its rules, which have evolved over decades, can make a terrifying impression on a person entering the cell for the first time. They may shout at you, hit you several times, or provoke you. But no one sets out to cause serious bodily harm; rather, this is done as a preventative measure. Athletes entering the camera for the first time sometimes take it all seriously and start a real fight. There have been cases where such people received serious injuries.

Formally, “registration” consists in the fact that you are asked questions, and you are obliged to answer. If you are not an experienced criminal, there is no need to pretend to be a seasoned criminal. Tell us honestly about yourself. If you don't know the rules of life in a cell, say so. When asked whether you will follow the rules, it is better to answer yes.

There are many typical questions. A six-five domino is shown. You are prompted to choose. After the choice has been made, they can announce that five means “rooster”, and six means “six” (spoonwash). Or you could choose a line between them, which means nothing.

Especially for a beginner, hooks for clothes numbered 5 and 6 can be left free. But things can also be thrown on a bed or bench...

They may ask the question: “You are flying on a parachute. On the left is the sea g..., on the right is the forest x... Where will you land?” There is no time to think, you need to answer quickly. The correct answer has a philosophical connotation: “In every sea there is an island, and in every forest there is a clearing.” They may ask the question: "In hopeless situation I'll have to either frame her... or sell my mother. What are you going to do?" The answer is categorical: "F... not being substituted, the mother is not for sale."

“The correct question when registering is: “Are you going to sell your mother or are you going to fuck her up?”
Answer: “Your mother is not for sale, your ass is not for sale”

They may ask another question: “There are two chairs, on one the peaks are sharpened, on the other the dicks are jerked off. Where will you sit?”
Answer: “I’ll take the sharpened peaks and cut off the jerked dicks!”

If a person has not passed registration, he is defined as a parachute, and upon regaining consciousness he feels himself in this place. A parachute is not yet a rooster, but it is no longer a man (or a “boy” in his youth). From a parachute you can become a man at any time. You need to pour a bucket of water on yourself, shout “Goodbye, parasha!” and try to register again. The rooster, of course, does not have such an opportunity."

It is clear that you may or may not guess the correct answer. If you answer incorrectly, most likely the maximum you will face is a few blows. But those who persist in delusions may receive an offer to make a decision - to go to the “roosters” or to the “sixes”. This is where “working back” is already very difficult. But you can: in some cases, if you apologize, you will be beaten, perhaps you will pay, but you will get away with it.

The last option is that you will have to sit for quite a long time. There is no point in going on a hunger strike here. Get ready for life in a cell, “registration” and communication with criminals. Try to cause as little trouble as possible for your neighbors and you can get rid of many problems. For example, if you spoil the air in the cell, you may be “charged” and beaten. The boss will not answer for snoring in the cell, but you will.

Don't sit down to play cards. You may be offered to “play for nothing”, and then it turns out that “just for the sake of it” means a lot of money or your ass.

You should not spit on the floor. Be very careful with swear words. They may ask: “Who did you have?” And they will demand to prove it. And when you can't, you'll have to answer.

And in general, you need to be very precise in your wording, otherwise you might get caught by the tongue. Literally - with a pin.

In general, the main rule is that if you don’t want trouble, behave with restraint. Most of the troubles people got in prison were their own fault. Like the man who, upon entering the cell, announced: “Hello, assholes!” They explained to him that this word was not good. Rising from the floor, he exclaimed: “They should have said that right away! Otherwise they crowed like roosters!”

The young guy told what riddles fellow inmates in prison tell a newcomer.

ATTENTION! For Android smartphone owners there is a bonus at the end of the article!

This prison game is a famous registration, it scares green prisoners even earlier, even in the pre-trial detention cells of the police, where there is always an experienced or simply talkative neighbor who wants to scare. Usually such riddles are asked to beginners for fun, but the riddles themselves and the answers to them will let you know what applies to you based on the answers. Prison games are not being abandoned. Try to give at least a couple of them the correct answer.

Two chairs (classic): There are two chairs, on one the peaks are sharp, on the other they are f*cked, which one will you sit on, which one will you sit your mother on?
Answer: I’ll take sharpened peaks, cut down the f*cks, sit down myself and imprison my mother.
Answer #2: I’ll sit on the peaks myself, and put my mother on my knees.

Parachute: You are flying on a parachute, on the right is a forest of shit, on the left is a sea of shit. Where will you sit?
Answer: In every forest there is a clearing, and in every sea there is an island.

You fell into a hole. There's a pie and a dick in the pit. What will you eat, what will you put in your mouth?
Answer: I'll take the pie and crawl out of the hole.

*opa or mother? Will you give it to F*ck or sell your mother?
Answer: Ass is not given, mother is not for sale.

Fork: Direct question: With a fork in the eye or in the ass?
Answer: And there are no forks in the zone.
Answer #2: I don't see any one-eyed people here.

Soap or bread? What will you eat - soap from the table or bread from the bucket?
Answer: The table is not a soap dish, the bucket is not a bread bin.

About the Sahara: You and Kent are walking through the Sahara Desert. At a distance of a hundred kilometers there is no housing, no settlements, no one and nothing but sand. Suddenly a poisonous snake crawls out, rushes at the kent and bites him on the dick. What are you going to do?
Answer: If the kent has a butt above his knee, then the snake will not reach him. If it’s lower, he’ll suck it himself.
Answer #2: Today it’s a kent, and tomorrow it’s a cop.

About the train: You are riding on a train, chained to levers that can be turned either left or right. There is a fork ahead - on the right the mother is tied to a post, on the left there are kents, about ten people. Where will you turn, who will you run over?
Answer: Today they are kents, tomorrow they are cops.
The answer to all the riddles above: I'll wake up.

About the bones: The prisoner sits on the shkonar, they open the feeding trough and give gruel and dry bread. In the morning they open the feeder again and see bones. Question: where do the bones come from if the prisoner is alive?
Answer: Dice.

About roosters: There lived two roosters, one was eaten before lunch, and the other after lunch, who was worse?
Answer: Those who already have it worse.

In addition to such riddles, citizen prisoners can also offer the newcomer a series of tests of intelligence and ingenuity.

Football: They draw a football goal on the wall and a ball on the floor. They say to score a goal. What will you do?
Answer: Ask for a pass.

Broom: They give you a broom and say: “Play something on the guitar.” What will you do?
Answer: Give me the broom with the words “And you set the mood first”

Sew up the bottle: They break the bottle and say: “Sew it up.” What will you do?
Answer: Ask to turn it inside out.

Accordion: They ask you to play the battery, like a button accordion. What will you do?
Answer: Ask to blow the furs.

Pilots and miners: Who will you be? - they ask the newcomer. Both are unknown and incomprehensible. Well, a miner, he answers. Then crawl under the bunks, there is a face, collect coal. He crawls, wiping away dust and dirt under the bunks.

Get out. Now who will you be? Well, probably better to be a pilot, he says. He is blindfolded with a towel. Which bunk will you fly from - from the bottom or from the top? - they ask him. I was scared if he said - from the bottom. But he has already heard and understands that the main thing is not to show himself to be a coward under any circumstances. From the top, he answers. Will you fall on dominoes or on arranged chess pieces? - they ask him.

When you stand blindfolded, you obviously have a very vivid picture of how you fly flat from two meters onto the points of arranged figures. It’s bad if a beginner chooses a domino: they will force him to fall, and registration will begin to become stricter. If he overcomes himself and calmly says: off to chess, there will be another three minutes of fear and that’s all.

While they are arranging the figures, while they are placing you on the bunk, and the most terrible seconds are when you have to fly off it yourself - fall with your whole body down blindly. Twitching sharply - there was no - he plops down, waiting acute pain, but falls onto a stretched blanket.

Pain resistance: A newcomer may be asked to compete with one of the old-timers in resistance to pain. They are both blindfolded (the old-timer first), seated on both sides of the table, and the newcomer’s scrotum, he feels with horror, is tied with a thin rope, the end of which - as they explain to him - is given into the hands of the opponent. And he is given the end of a similarly tied rope.

The start is strictly on command. He quickly pulls the rope, feels unbearable pain, screams and pulls harder, but the pain is even sharper, and he almost loses consciousness, because he is pulling himself - the rope is simply thrown around the table. They untie his eyes and see how he reacted to the bullying.

Bus: A newcomer gets down on all fours, and someone heavier climbs on his back. Go! The newcomer walks two or three meters, then the space that is usually in the cell stops to turn around and rest. The rider-passenger asks him which stop. Following the tone of the game, the beginner names one. Let's move on! This will last until he decides to say: the final stop.

Astrologer: A novice stargazer climbs under his padded jacket and must, through its extended upward sleeve - a telescope - count loudly the stars drawn on paper - he sees them clearly through the sleeve, as if through a pipe. At this time, a basin suddenly pours onto him through his sleeve. cold water- a basin for washing, called Alyonka for some reason, is always in the cell. How will a newcomer react to this, crawling out wet to the general laughter of those around him?

Do you respect me? Do you respect me? - asks one of the old-timers. Yes! - the newcomer answers readily. Then drink a mug of water to my health. He drinks. Do you respect me? - asks the second. Then a mug for me too. And in a cell, as a rule, there are more than a dozen people. After three or four mugs it becomes torture. Guess what, newbie, on the second or third glass, guess to say that you respect everyone and drink the last one for your overall health.

Based on: Guberman I.M., Walking around the barracks, M., “Verb”, 1993, p. 78-82.

Bonus for owners of a gadget on the Android OS - There is a quest application “Prisoner Test 2.0” in the playmarket. In this application you can independently register for a “hut” using the knowledge from this article.

Well, here are some helpful reviews of the app from the Play Store:

The young guy told what riddles fellow inmates in prison tell a newcomer.

ATTENTION! For Android smartphone owners there is a bonus at the end of the article!

Pit: You fell into a hole. There's a pie and a dick in the pit. What will you eat, what will you put in your mouth?
Answer: I'll take the pie and crawl out of the hole.