If you start to analyze what exactly they, and you personally, lack for a successful career, then you will certainly focus on two very important factors: the ability to influence people and earn their respect. These are the two pillars on which any successful career is usually built, this is what most people lack, and what the “lucky” few are given from birth. Then these “lucky ones” become big managers, general directors of companies, or go into politics, giving others the opportunity to envy them with white or black envy.
First, let's figure out what exactly a lack of influence on others and lack of respect on their part means. The first is that your ideas, needs, comments, views and feelings are not being taken into account enough by your colleagues and superiors.
Correcting this state of affairs should begin with changing your personal image. Neatness and elegance, sufficient prestige of your clothing and its correspondence to the tastes of your environment are an indispensable condition for you to be accepted in society at least on equal terms. However, it should be remembered that in any clothes you should feel “at home”: if a magnificent jacket is too tight or too big, if your, even the most branded clothes make you hold yourself very tensely, this will certainly be on the conscious and subconscious level is noticed by others, and will lower your status.
The next one is very important point: posture. Here you will need a lot of training to achieve a free and at the same time straight gait, which will emphasize that you are an independent, strong and self-confident person.
And finally, your very behavior should radiate this confidence. It should be remembered that many people who lack the ability to influence others often confuse self-confidence with aggressiveness. No, self-confidence is, of course, not aggressiveness at all, which often leads to attempts to intimidate others and violate their rights. IN modern society With such methods, you are unlikely to be able to earn the respect of people and increase the degree of your influence on them.
Therefore, let's clearly define what exactly prevents you from feeling such confidence, on the basis of which any true respect arises. Sociopsychologists usually name six main reasons that underlie self-doubt:
1. Lack of practice: You don't practice yourself often enough and don't try to establish whether you can be more confident.
2. Upbringing that shaped you: Parents and teachers, in one way or another, reduced your ability to stand up for yourself as a child.
3. Vague ideas: you do not have clear patterns of behavior, and you yourself do not know what you want.
4. Fear of Hostility: You fear manifestations of hostility, anger and negative reactions and avoid any conflicts.
5. Underestimating yourself: you do not feel the right to take a firm position and demand a correct and honest attitude towards yourself.
6. Poor self-presentation: You usually express your thoughts in a vague and unconvincing, contradictory or emotional way.
Now analyze your ability to feel confident and determine which of these six obstacles hinders you the most. Are there situations in which you constantly lack confidence? If yes, is it possible to find common cause? Do you find that a particular person or environment creates particular difficulties for you?
When you answer these questions with honesty, you can find ways to truly become more confident in yourself and begin to influence those around you.
You can develop these skills by watching how other people handle situations that require self-confidence and gain the respect of others. By putting into practice what you learn, you will expand your skill set.
But at the same time, you should remember some basics, without which you will never earn the respect of people, and which you should adhere to from the very first day of your entry into any team:
Avoid confusing emotions: If you are angry, offended, or emotionally hurt, expect others to react to your emotions, not to what you want to convey to them.
Keep it simple: Sometimes the importance of what you want to convey to others gets lost by being too complex or trying to deal with multiple issues at once.
Achieve your goal: if you have already proposed something, bring it to the end, do not give up what you started and at any cost force others to pay attention to it.
Don’t “drop” yourself: if something is important to you, of fundamental importance, make sure others know about your position.
Make sure that you are not “knocked down”: if at some point you find yourself in the center of attention, and someone wants to switch attention to yourself, make a lot of efforts to ensure that the attention of listeners or viewers is returned to your person.
A mistake does not weaken: if you make a mistake - which sooner or later happens to everyone - do not allow a feeling of inadequacy to arise in your place. This feeling undermines your position.
Strive for victory after victory: try to create situations in which your work will bring you victory, but do not stop there and strive for new achievements.
Following all these principles is certainly not easy, but it is worth following them. And I can only wish you good luck on this path.
Yesterday I had interesting conversation with one elderly teacher. Not at all philological, it should be noted. We discussed traveling around Europe and, talking about one of his trips to France, he talked about his acquaintance with Pushkin’s descendants.
If you read Onegin, you probably thought about the meaning of the lines:
My uncle is the most fair rules,
When I seriously got sick
He forced himself to respect
And I couldn't think of anything better.
His example to others is science;
I think everyone remembers the version about how Krylov crawled under the table when he was playing forfeits with Pushkin and Vyazemsky. There he had to write a fable and the fable about the Donkey of the most honest rules was born.
There is another version. That in the first editions there was a semicolon. What does a semicolon decide in the meaning of a quatrain?
My uncle has the most honest rules
When I got seriously ill;
He forced himself to respect
And I couldn't think of anything better.
His example to others is science;
So, the semicolon changes the meaning that we see with the naked eye - “A decent uncle forced himself to be respected when he got sick” to another: “The uncle became decent when he got sick.”
And now I’ll tell you about the third version, which was discussed with those same descendants of Pushkin, and which yesterday impressed me greatly.
In the time of Pushkin, a person who drank was called a person of “honest rules.” And “the most honest rules” are already a binge alcoholic, you have to understand.
“He forced himself to be respected,” as those about whom Nepomniachtchi writes correctly noted, discussing the meaning of the same phrase, he died. Because it’s either good or nothing about the dead.
And it turns out that:
My uncle is a terrible alcoholic
When I got seriously ill,
He died,
Which is for the best.
And others should do the same too;
You, like my husband, will begin to remember how Evgeny Onegin cared hard for his uncle:
But, my God, what a bore
To sit with the patient day and night,
Without leaving a single step!
What low deceit
To amuse the half-dead,
Adjust his pillows
It's sad to bring medicine,
Sigh and think to yourself:
When will the devil take you!"
But you, like him, forget that this is what the young rake THOUGHT.
But in fact, a little lower in the same Eugene Onegin we read:
Suddenly he really got
Report from the manager
That uncle is dying in bed
And I would be glad to say goodbye to him.
After reading the sad message,
Evgeniy on a date right away
Swiftly galloped through the mail
And I already yawned in advance,
Getting ready, for the sake of money,
For sighs, boredom and deception
(And thus I began my novel);
But, having arrived at my uncle’s village,
I found it already on the table,
As a tribute to the ready land.
So, whether the uncle was an alcoholic or not, he died without bothering his relatives. It’s also nice about alcohol, but I don’t have any reliable sources as to what alcoholics among the nobles were allegorically called.
Very subjective notes
IN THE FIRST STRONGS OF MY LETTER...
The first line of “Eugene Onegin” has always aroused great interest among critics, literary scholars and literary historians. Although, strictly speaking, it is not the first: two epigraphs and a dedication are placed before it - Pushkin dedicated the novel to P. Pletnev, his friend, the rector of St. Petersburg University.
The first stanza begins with the thoughts of the hero of the novel Eugene Onegin:
"My uncle has the most honest rules,
When I seriously fell ill,
He forced himself to respect
And I couldn’t think of anything better;
His example to other science:
But, my God, what a bore
Sitting with the patient day and night,
Without leaving a single step!
What low deceit
To amuse the half-dead,
Adjust his pillows
It's sad to bring medicine,
Sigh and think to yourself:
When will the devil take you!"
Both the first line and the entire stanza as a whole have evoked and still evoke numerous interpretations.
NOBLEMS, COMMON AND ACADEMICIANS
N. Brodsky, the author of the commentary to the EO, believes that the hero ironically applied to his uncle verses from Krylov’s fable “The Donkey and the Peasant” (1819): “The donkey had the most honest rules,” and thus expressed his attitude towards his relative: “Pushkin in the reflections of the “young rake” about the difficult need “for the sake of money” to be ready “for sighs, boredom and deception” (stanza LII) revealed the true meaning of family ties, covered with hypocrisy, showed what the principle of kinship turned into in that real reality, where, as Belinsky puts it, “internally, out of conviction, no one... recognizes him, but out of habit, out of unconsciousness and out of hypocrisy, everyone recognizes him.”
This was a typically Soviet approach to the interpretation of the passage exposing the birthmarks of tsarism and the lack of spirituality and duplicity of the nobility, although hypocrisy in family ties is characteristic of absolutely all segments of the population, and even in Soviet time it has not disappeared from life at all, since, with rare exceptions, it can be considered an immanent property of human nature in general. In Chapter IV of EO, Pushkin writes about relatives:
Hm! hmm! Noble reader,
Are all your relatives healthy?
Allow: maybe, whatever
Now you learn from me,
What exactly does relatives mean?
These are the native people:
We must caress them
Love, sincerely respect
And, according to the custom of the people,
About Christmas to visit them
Or send congratulations by mail,
So that the rest of the year
They didn't think about us...
So, may God grant them long days!
Brodsky's commentary was first published in 1932, then reprinted several times in Soviet times; this is a fundamental and good work of a famous scientist.
But even in the 19th century, critics did not ignore the first lines of the novel - the poems served as the basis for accusing both Pushkin himself and his hero of immorality. Oddly enough, the commoner, democrat V.G. Belinsky, came to the defense of the nobleman Onegin.
“We remember,” wrote a remarkable critic in 1844, “how ardently many readers expressed their indignation at the fact that Onegin rejoices at the illness of his uncle and is horrified by the need to pretend to be a saddened relative,”
Sigh and think to yourself:
When will the devil take you!
Many people are still extremely dissatisfied with this."
Belinsky analyzes the first stanza in detail and finds every reason to justify Onegin, emphasizing not only the lack of pharisaism in the hero of the novel, but also his intelligence, natural behavior, ability for introspection and a host of other positive qualities.
"Let us turn to Onegin. His uncle was alien to him in all respects. And what could there be in common between Onegin, who already yawned equally
Among the fashionable and ancient halls,
And between the venerable landowner, who in the wilderness of his village
I looked out the window and squashed flies.
They will say: he is his benefactor. What kind of benefactor if Onegin was the legal heir of his estate? Here the benefactor is not an uncle, but the law, the right of inheritance.* What is the position of a person who is obliged to play the role of a grieved, compassionate and tender relative at the deathbed of a complete stranger and stranger to him? They will say: who obliged him to play such a low role? Like who? A sense of delicacy, humanity. If, for whatever reason, you cannot help but accept a person whose acquaintance is both difficult and boring for you, aren’t you obligated to be polite and even kind to him, although internally you tell him to go to hell? That in Onegin’s words there is some kind of mocking lightness visible, only intelligence and naturalness are visible in this, because the absence of strained, heavy solemnity in the expression of ordinary everyday relationships is a sign of intelligence. U secular people It’s not even always intelligence, but more often it’s manner, and one cannot but agree that this is an excellent manner.”
Belinsky, if you wish, can find anything you want.
Praising Onegin for his numerous virtues, Belinsky, however, for some reason completely loses sight of the fact that the hero is going to look after his uncle not only and not so much out of a sense of “delicacy” and “compassion”, but for the sake of money and future inheritance, which clearly hints at the manifestation of bourgeois tendencies in the hero’s mentality and directly suggests that he, in addition to other advantages, was by no means deprived of common sense and practical acumen.
Thus, we are convinced that the habit of analyzing the frivolous thoughts of the young dandy cited by Pushkin was brought into fashion by Belinsky. He was followed by N. Brodsky, Y. Lotman, V. Nabokov, V. Nepomnyashchy. And also Etkind, Wolpert, Greenbaum... Surely someone else who has escaped our attention close attention. But a unanimity of opinion has not yet been achieved.
So, returning to Brodsky, we state: the literary critic believed that the words “my uncle has the most honest rules” correlate with a line from Krylov’s fable and hint at the poverty of Uncle Eugene’s mental abilities, which, strictly speaking, is by no means refuted by the subsequent characterization given to the uncle in II chapter of the novel:
He settled in that peace,
Where is the village old-timer?
For about forty years he was quarreling with the housekeeper,
I looked out the window and squashed flies.
Yu.M. Lotman categorically disagreed with this version: “The statement found in the comments to the EO that the expression “the most honest rules...” is a quote from Krylov’s fable “The Donkey and the Man” (“The donkey had the most honest rules... ") does not seem convincing. Krylov does not use any rare utterance, but a living phraseological unit oral speech that time (cf.: “...he ruled the pious..” in the fable “The Cat and the Cook”). Krylov could have been for Pushkin in in this case only an example of addressing oral, living speech. Contemporaries were unlikely to perceive this as a literary quotation.”
* The question of the right of inheritance in relation to Onegin requires comment professional lawyer or legal historian.
KRYLOV AND ANNA KERN
It is difficult to say how Pushkin’s contemporaries perceived this line, but the fact that the poet himself knew the fable is reliably known from the memoirs of A. Kern, who very expressively described the reading of it by the author himself at one of the social events:
“At one of the evenings at the Olenins’, I met Pushkin and did not notice him: my attention was absorbed in the charades that were then being played out and in which Krylov, Pleshcheev and others took part. I don’t remember, for some reason Krylov was forced to read one of his fables. He sat down on a chair in the middle of the hall; we all crowded around him, and I will never forget how good he was reading his Donkey! And now I can still hear his voice and see his reasonable face and the comic expression with which he said: “The donkey had the most honest rules!”
In the child of such enchantment, it was difficult to see anyone other than the culprit of poetic pleasure, and that’s why I didn’t notice Pushkin.”
Judging by these memoirs, even if we attribute A. Kern’s “children of charm” more to her coquetry than to her sincerity, Krylov’s fable was well known in Pushkin’s circle. In our time, if we have heard about it, it is primarily in connection with the novel Eugene Onegin. But it is impossible not to take into account the fact that in 1819, in the Olenins’ salon, at a gathering of society and in the presence of Pushkin, Krylov read the fable “The Donkey and the Peasant.” Why did the writer choose her? A fresh fable, just recently written? Quite possible. Why not present a new work to a discerning and at the same time friendly public? At first glance, the fable is quite simple:
Donkey and man
Man in the garden for the summer
Having hired Donkey, he assigned
Ravens and sparrows are chased by an impudent race.
The donkey had the most honest rules:
I am unfamiliar with neither predatory nor theft:
He didn’t profit from the owner’s leaf,
And it’s a shame to give the birds a treat;
But the peasant's profit from the garden was bad.
The donkey, chasing the birds, with all the donkey's legs,
Along all the ridges, up and down,
Such a gallop has risen,
That he crushed and trampled everything in the garden.
Seeing here that his work was wasted,
Peasant on the back of a donkey
He took out the loss with a club.
“And nothing!” everyone shouts: “Serves the cattle right!
With his mind
Should I take on this matter?
And I will say, not to stand up for the Donkey;
He is definitely to blame (and the settlement has been made with him),
But it seems that he is also wrong
Who instructed the Donkey to guard his garden.
The man instructed the donkey to guard the garden, and the diligent but stupid donkey, in pursuit of the birds eating the harvest, trampled all the beds, for which he was punished. But Krylov blames not so much the donkey as the man who hired the diligent fool for the job.
But what was the reason for writing this simple fable? Indeed, on the topic of the obliging fool, who is “more dangerous than the enemy,” Krylov wrote quite a lot back in 1807 popular work"The Hermit and the Bear."
LITERATURE AND POLITICS
It is known that Krylov loved to respond to current political events - both international and those occurring within the country. So, according to the testimony of Baron M.A. Korf, the reason for creating the fable “Quartet” was the transformation of the State Council, the departments of which were headed by Count P.V. Zavadovsky, Prince P.V. Lopukhin, Count A.A. Arakcheev and Count N.S. Mordvinov: “It is known that we owe the long debate about how to seat them and even several successive transplants to Krylov’s witty fable “Quartet.”
It is believed that Krylov meant Mordvinov by Monkey, Zavadovsky by Donkey, Lopukhin by Goat, Arakcheev by Bear.”
Wasn’t the fable “The Donkey and the Man” a similar response to well-known events? For example, the introduction of military settlements in Russia in the first quarter of the 19th century can be considered such an event to which the attention of the entire society was attracted.
In 1817, military settlements began to be organized in Russia. The idea of forming such settlements belonged to Tsar Alexander I, and he was going to entrust this undertaking to Arakcheev, who, oddly enough, was actually opposed to their creation, but obeyed the will of the Tsar. He put all his energy into carrying out the assignment (it is well known that Arakcheev was an excellent organizer), but did not take into account some of the peculiarities of the psychology of the peasants and authorized the use of extreme forms of coercion when creating settlements, which led to unrest and even uprisings. Noble society had a negative attitude towards military settlements.
Didn’t Krylov portray the all-powerful minister Arakcheev, under the guise of an overly dutiful donkey, a doofus of the tsar, but not a heavenly one, but a completely earthly one, and the tsar himself as a short-sighted man, who so unsuccessfully chose an honest donkey to carry out an important task (Arakcheev was known for his conscientiousness and incorruptibility ), but overly diligent and zealous? It is possible that, in portraying a stupid donkey, Krylov (despite his outward good nature, the famous fabulist was a man with a sharp tongue, sometimes even poisonous) was aiming at the Tsar himself, who borrowed the idea of military settlements from different sources, but was going to introduce the system mechanically, without taking into account either the spirit of the Russian people or the practical details of the implementation of such a responsible project.
The meeting of A. Kern with Pushkin at the Olenins took place at the end of the winter of 1819, and already in the summer strong unrest broke out in one of the settlements, ending cruel punishment dissatisfied, which did not add popularity either to the idea of such settlements or to Arakcheev himself. If the fable was a response to the introduction of military settlements, then it is no wonder that it was well known among the Decembrists and nobles, who were distinguished by freethinking.
PHRASEOLOGISM OR GALLICISM?
As for the “living phraseology of oral speech of that time” as an example of addressing oral, living expression, this remark does not seem so impeccably true. Firstly, in the same line of the fable “The Cat and the Cook”, to which Yu.M. Lotman resorts to quote to prove his thought, the word “funeral” is not used at all, and the lines themselves represent the speech of the author, a person educated, able to apply literary expression. And this literary turn of phrase could not be more appropriate here for the reason that the lines sound ironic and parody the statement of one of the characters in the fable - the Cook, a person very inclined to the art of rhetoric:
Some Cook, literate,
He ran from the kitchen
To the tavern (he ruled the pious
And on this day the godfather held a funeral feast),
And at home, keep food away from mice
I left the cat.
And secondly, in similar phraseology there is little oral live speech - the phrase would sound much more natural in the mouth of a Russian person - fair man. A man of honest rules is clearly a bookish education; it appears in literature in the middle of the 18th century and may be a tracing paper with French. A similar phrase, perhaps, was used in letters of recommendation, and it can more likely be attributed to written business speech.
“It is significant that, although Gallicisms, especially as a model for the formation of phraseological units in the Russian language, actively influenced Russian linguistic processes, both Shishkovists and Karamzinists preferred to blame each other for their use,” Lotman writes in comments to EO, confirming that the very idea that often it was Gallicisms that were the source of the formation of Russian phraseological units.
In Fonvizin’s play “The Choice of a Governor,” Seum recommends the nobleman Nelstetsov to the prince as a mentor: “. These days I met a staff officer, Mr. Nelstetsov, who recently bought a small village in our district. We became friends during our first acquaintance, and I found in him an intelligent man, honest and honorable.” The phrase “fair rules” sounds, as we see, in an almost official recommendation for the position of a teacher.
Famusov recalls Sophia’s first governess, Madame Rosier: “Quiet character, rare rules.”
Famusov is an average gentleman, an official, a not very educated person, who amusingly mixes colloquial vocabulary and official business expressions in his speech. So Madame Rosier got a conglomerate of colloquial speech and clericalism as a characterization.
In I.A. Krylov’s play “A Lesson for Daughters,” he uses a similar phrase in his speech, equipped with book expressions (and it must be said that often these book phrases are tracings from French, despite the fact that the hero fights in every possible way against the use of French in everyday life ), educated nobleman Velkarov: “Who can assure me that in the city, in your lovely societies, there will not be marquises of the same cut, from whom you gain both intelligence and rules.”
In Pushkin’s works, one of the meanings of the word “rules” is the principles of morality and behavior. The “Dictionary of Pushkin’s Language” provides numerous examples of the poet’s use of phraseological units (Gallicism?) with the word “rule” and the usual phrase “honest person”.
But the firmness with which she was able to endure poverty does credit to her rules. (Byron, 1835).
He is a man of noble rules and will not resurrect the times of word and deed (Letter to Bestuzhev, 1823).
Pious, humble soul
Punishing pure muses, saving Bantysh,
And the noble Magnitsky helped him,
A husband who is firm in his rules and has an excellent soul
(Second Epistle to the Censor, 1824).
My soul Pavel,
Follow my rules:
Love this, that, that
Don't do this.
(In the album to Pavel Vyazemsky, 1826-27)
What will Alexey think if he recognizes his Akulina in the well-bred young lady? What opinion will he have about her behavior and rules, about her prudence? (Young lady-peasant, 1930).
Along with the book usage of “noble rules”, we also find colloquial “honest fellow” in Pushkin’s texts:
. "My second?" Evgeniy said:
"Here he is: my friend, Monsieur Guillot.
I don't foresee any objections
For my presentation:
Even though he is an unknown person,
But of course the guy is honest." (EO)
Ivan Petrovich Belkin was born from honest and noble parents in 1798 in the village of Goryukhin. (History of the village of Goryukhina, 1830).
RELY ON YOUR UNCLE, BUT DON’T FAIL YOURSELF
The first line is interesting not only from the point of view linguistic analysis, but also in the aspect of establishing archetypal connections in the novel.
The archetype of the uncle-nephew relationship has been reflected in literature since the time of mythological legends and in its embodiment gives several options: uncle and nephew are at enmity or oppose each other, most often not sharing the power or love of the beauty (Horus and Seth, Jason and Pelius, Hamlet and Claudius , Rameau's nephew); the uncle patronizes his nephew and is on friendly terms with him (epics, “The Tale of Igor’s Campaign”, “Madosh” by Alfred Musset, later “My Uncle Benjamin” by K. Tillier, “An Ordinary History” by I. Goncharov, “Philip and Others” by Seys Notebooma).
Within the framework of this paradigm, it is possible to distinguish transitional models, characterized by varying degrees of certainty of relationships between relatives, including an ironic or completely neutral attitude towards the uncle. An example of an ironic and at the same time respectful attitude towards his uncle is the behavior of Tristram Shandy, and a transitional model can be the relationship between Tristan and King Mark (Tristan and Isolde), which changes repeatedly throughout the narrative.
Examples can be multiplied almost endlessly: in almost every literary work there is your own uncle, even if he is lying around - a reasoner, a guardian, a comedian, an oppressor, a benefactor, an adversary, a patron, an enemy, an oppressor, a tyrant, and so on.
Numerous reflections of this archetype are widely known not only in literature, but also directly in life; it is enough to recall A. Pogorelsky (A.A. Perovsky), the author of “Lafert’s Poppy Tree”, famous fairy tale"Black Hen" and his nephew, wonderful poet and writer A.K. Tolstoy; I.I. Dmitriev, a famous writer of the early 19th century, fabulist, and his nephew M.A. Dmitriev, literary critic and a memoirist who left memories from which many draw interesting information from the life of literary Moscow at the beginning of the nineteenth century and from the life of V.L. Pushkin; uncle and nephew of the Pisarevs, Anton Pavlovich and Mikhail Alexandrovich Chekhov; N. Gumilyov and Sverchkov, etc.
Oscar Wilde was the great-nephew of the very famous Irish writer Maturin, whose novel Melmoth the Wanderer, which had a significant influence on the development of European literature in general and on Pushkin in particular, it began with the hero, a young student, going to his dying uncle.
First of all, of course, we should talk about Alexander Sergeevich himself and his uncle Vasily Lvovich. Autobiographical motives in the opening lines of the EO are noted by many researchers. L.I. Wolpert in the book “Pushkin and French Literature” writes: “It is also important that in Pushkin’s time direct speech was not marked with quotation marks: the first stanza did not have them (we note, by the way, that even now few people keep them in memory). The reader who encounters a familiar “I” (in the form possessive pronoun), was filled with confidence that we were talking about the author and his uncle. However, the last line (“When will the devil take you!”) plunged me into amazement. And only after reading the beginning of the second stanza - “So thought the young rake” - the reader could come to his senses and breathe a sigh of relief.”
I can’t say exactly how things are going with the publication of individual chapters, but in the famous edition of 1937, which repeats lifetime edition 1833, quotation marks. Some of the writers complained about the youth and simplicity of the Russian public, but still they were not so simple-minded as not to understand that EO is still not the autobiography of a poet, but piece of art. But, nevertheless, some game, allusiveness, is undoubtedly present.
L.I. Volpert makes an absolutely charming and accurate observation: “The author, in some mysterious way, managed to “crawl” into the stanza (into the hero’s internal monologue) and express an ironic attitude towards the hero, the reader and himself. The hero is ironic at his uncle, the “well-read” reader, and at himself.”
GOOD UNCLE
Alexander Sergeevich's uncle, Vasily Lvovich Pushkin, a poet, wit and dandy, for all that he was a good-natured, sociable person, in some ways even naive and childishly simple-minded. In Moscow he knew everyone and enjoyed great success in social drawing rooms. His friends included almost all prominent Russian writers late 18th – early 19th centuries. And he himself was a fairly famous writer: Vasily Lvovich wrote messages, fables, fairy tales, elegies, romances, songs, epigrams, madrigals. An educated man who knew several languages, he was successfully engaged in translation activities. Vasily Lvovich's poem "Dangerous Neighbor", extremely popular due to its piquant plot, humor and lively, free language, was widely distributed in lists. Vasily Lvovich played a significant role in the fate of his nephew - he took care of him in every possible way and arranged for him to study at the Lyceum. A.S. Pushkin responded to him with sincere love and respect.
To you, O Nestor Arzamas,
A poet brought up in battles, -
A dangerous neighbor for singers
At the terrible heights of Parnassus,
Defender of taste, formidable Behold!
To you, my uncle, on the New Year
The same desire for fun
And the weak heart translation -
A message in verse and prose.
In your letter you called me brother; but I didn’t dare call you by that name, it was too flattering for me.
I haven't completely lost my mind yet
From Bachian rhymes - staggering on Pegasus -
I haven’t forgotten myself, whether I’m glad or not.
No, no - you are not my brother at all:
You are my uncle on Parnassus too.
Under the humorous and free form of addressing the uncle, sympathy and good attitude are clearly felt, slightly, however, diluted with irony and mockery.
Pushkin failed to avoid (or perhaps this was done deliberately) a certain ambiguity: reading the last lines, you involuntarily remember famous expression- The devil himself is not his brother. And although the letter was written in 1816, and the poems were published in 1821, nevertheless, you involuntarily correlate them with the lines of EO - when will the devil take you. You correlate, of course, without any conclusions, much less organizational conclusions, but some kind of devilry creeps between the lines.
In his message to Vyazemsky, Pushkin again recalls his uncle, whom he flattered very cleverly in this short poem, calling him a “tender, subtle, sharp” writer:
Satirist and love poet,
Our Aristipus and Asmodeus],
You are not Anna Lvovna's nephew,
My late aunt.
The writer is gentle, subtle, sharp,
My uncle is not your uncle
But, dear, the muses are our sisters,
So, you are still my brother.
This, however, did not stop him from making fun of his kind relative, and sometimes from writing a parody, though not so much offensive as witty.
In 1827, in “Materials for “Excerpts from Letters, Thoughts and Remarks,” Pushkin writes, but does not publish (printed only in 1922), a parody of his uncle’s aphorisms, which begins with the words: “My uncle once fell ill.” The literal construction of the title involuntarily makes one remember the first lines of EO.
“My uncle once fell ill. A friend visited him. “I’m bored,” said the uncle, “I would like to write, but I don’t know what.” “Write whatever you get,” the friend answered, “thoughts, literary remarks and political, satirical portraits, etc. This is very easy: this is how Seneca and Montagne wrote.” and wrote: sometimes mere trifles upset us. At that moment they brought him a magazine, he looked into it and saw an article about dramatic art written by a knight of romanticism, he thought and wrote: I prefer Racine and Moliere to Shakespeare and Calderon - despite. to the cries of the newest critics. “My uncle wrote two dozen more similar thoughts and went to bed. The next day he sent them to the journalist, who politely thanked him, and my uncle had the pleasure of re-reading his printed thoughts.”
The parody is easy to compare with the original text - the maxims of Vasily Lvovich: “Many of us are ready for advice, rare for services.
Tartuffe and the Misanthrope are superior to all the current Trilogies. Without fearing the wrath of fashionable romantics and despite Schlegel's strict criticism, I will say sincerely that I prefer Moliere to Goethe, and Racine to Schiller. The French adopted from the Greeks, and themselves became models in dramatic art."
And to draw a simple conclusion, quite obvious: Pushkin’s parody is a kind of tracing paper that makes fun of his uncle’s truisms. The Volga flows into the Caspian Sea. Talk to smart, polite people; their conversation is always pleasant, and you are not a burden to them. The second statement, as you might guess, belongs to the pen of Vasily Lvovich. Although, it must be admitted, some of his maxims are very fair, but at the same time they were still too banal and suffered from sentimentality, reaching the point of sentimentality.
However, you can see for yourself:
Love is the beauty of life; friendship is the consolation of the heart. They talk a lot about them, but few people know them.
Atheism is complete madness. Look at the sun, the moon and the stars, at the structure of the universe, at yourself, and you will say with tenderness: there is a God!
It is interesting that both Vasily Lvovich’s text and Pushkin’s parody echo an excerpt from L. Stern’s novel “The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman” (volume 1, chapter 21):
Tell me what the person was called - I write so hastily that I
no time to rummage through your memory or books - who first made the observation “that our weather and climate are extremely variable”? Whoever he is, his observation is absolutely correct. - But the conclusion from it, namely “that we owe such a variety of strange and wonderful characters to this circumstance,” does not belong to him; - it was made by another person, at least a hundred and fifty years later... Further, that this rich store of original material is the true and natural reason for the enormous superiority of our comedies over the French and all in general that were or could be written on the continent - this discovery was made only in the middle of the reign of King William, when the great Dryden (if I am not mistaken)
happily attacked him in one of his long prefaces. True, at the end of the reign of Queen Anne, the great Addison took it under his protection and interpreted it more fully to the public in two or three numbers of his Spectator; but the discovery itself was not his. - Then, fourthly and lastly, the observation that the above-mentioned strange disorder of our climate, giving rise to such a strange disorder of our characters, in some way rewards us, giving us material for fun entertainment when the weather does not allow leaving the house - this is my own observation - it was made by me in rainy weather today, March 26, 1759, between nine and ten o'clock in the morning.
The characterization of Uncle Toby is also close to Onegin’s statement about his uncle:
My uncle, Toby Shandy, madam, was a gentleman who, along with the virtues usually characteristic of a man of impeccable integrity and honesty, also possessed, and, moreover, of the highest degree, one that is rarely, if not not at all, included in the list of virtues: it was extreme, unparalleled natural modesty...
Both of them were uncles of the most honest rules. True, everyone had their own rules.
UNCLE NOT MY DREAM
So, what do we learn about Uncle Eugene Onegin? Pushkin devoted not very many lines to this off-stage character, this simulacrum, no longer a person, but a periphrastic “tribute to the ready earth.” This is a homunculos made up of an English inhabitant of a Gothic castle and a Russian lover of a down sofa and apple liqueurs.
The venerable castle was built
How castles should be built:
Extremely durable and calm
In the taste of smart antiquity.
There are lofty chambers everywhere,
There is damask wallpaper in the living room,
Portraits of kings on the walls,
And stoves with colorful tiles.
All this is now dilapidated,
I don't really know why;
Yes, however, my friend
There was very little need for that,
Then he yawned
Among fashionable and ancient halls.
He settled in that peace,
Where is the village old-timer?
For about forty years he was quarreling with the housekeeper,
I looked out the window and squashed flies.
Everything was simple: the floor was oak,
Two wardrobes, a table, a down sofa,
Not a speck of ink anywhere.
Onegin opened the cabinets:
In one I found an expense notebook,
In another there is a whole line of liqueurs,
Jugs of apple water
And the eighth year calendar;
An old man with a lot to do,
I didn’t look at other books.
The uncle’s house is called a “venerable castle” - before us is a solid and solid building, created “in the taste of smart antiquity.” In these lines one cannot help but feel a respectful attitude towards the past century and a love for ancient times, which for Pushkin had a special attractive force. “Antiquity” for a poet is a word of magical charm; it is always “magical” and is associated with the stories of witnesses of the past and fascinating novels in which simplicity was combined with cordiality:
Then a novel in the old way
It will take my cheerful sunset.
Not the torment of secret villainy
I will portray it menacingly,
But I’ll just tell you
Traditions of the Russian family,
Love's captivating dreams
Yes, the morals of our antiquity.
I will retell simple speeches
Father or UNCLE of the old man...
Onegin’s uncle settled in the village about forty years ago, Pushkin writes in the second chapter of the novel. If we proceed from Lotman's assumption that the action of the chapter takes place in 1820, then the uncle settled in the village in the eighties of the eighteenth century for some reasons unknown to the reader (maybe punishment for a duel? or disgrace? - it is unlikely that the young man would go to live in the village of his own free will - and obviously he did not go there for poetic inspiration).
At first he equipped his castle according to last word fashion and comfort - damask wallpaper (damask is a woven silk fabric used for wall upholstery, a very expensive pleasure), soft sofas, colorful tiles (a tile stove was an item of luxury and prestige) - most likely, the capital's habits were still strong. Then, apparently succumbing to the laziness of the everyday course of life, or perhaps the stinginess developed by the village view of things, he stopped monitoring the improvement of the house, which was gradually deteriorating, not supported by constant care.
Uncle Onegin's lifestyle was not distinguished by a variety of entertainment - sitting by the window, quarreling with the housekeeper and playing cards with her on Sundays, killing innocent flies - that, perhaps, was all his fun and amusement. In fact, the uncle himself is just like a fly: his whole life fits into a series of fly phraseological units: like a sleepy fly, what kind of fly has bitten, flies die, white flies, flies eat you, under a fly, as if you swallowed a fly, they die like flies, - among which the one given by Pushkin has several meanings, and each characterizes the philistine existence of his uncle - being bored, drinking and killing flies (the last meaning is direct) - this is a simple algorithm of his life.
There are no intellectual interests in his uncle’s life - no traces of ink were found in his house, he only keeps a notebook of calculations, and reads one book - “the calendar of the eighth year.” Pushkin did not specify which calendar exactly - it could be the Court calendar, the Monthly Book for the summer from R. Chr. 1808 (Brodsky and Lotman) or Bryusov calendar (Nabokov). The Bruce calendar is a unique reference book for many occasions, containing extensive sections with advice and predictions, which for more than two centuries in Russia were considered the most accurate. The calendar published planting dates and crop prospects, predicted weather and natural disasters, victories in wars and the state of the Russian economy. The reading is entertaining and useful.
The uncle's ghost appears in the seventh chapter - the housekeeper Anisya remembers him when she shows Tatyana the manor's house.
Anisya immediately appeared to her,
And the door opened before them,
And Tanya enters the empty house,
Where did our hero recently live?
She looks: forgotten in the hall
The billiard cue was resting,
Lying on a crumpled sofa
Manege whip. Tanya is further away;
The old woman said to her: “Here is the fireplace;
Here the master sat alone.
I dined with him here in the winter
The late Lensky, our neighbor.
Come here, follow me.
This is the master's office;
Here he slept, ate coffee,
Listened to the clerk's reports
And I read a book in the morning...
And the old master lived here;
It happened to me on Sunday,
Here under the window, wearing glasses,
He deigned to play fools.
God bless his soul,
And his bones have peace
In the grave, in mother earth, raw!”
This is, perhaps, all that we learn about Onegin’s uncle.
The appearance of the uncle in the novel resembles a real person - Lord William Byron, to whom the great English poet was a great-nephew and only heir. In the article “Byron” (1835), Pushkin describes this colorful personality as follows:
“Lord William, brother of Admiral Byron, his own grandfather, was
a strange and unhappy man. Once in a duel he stabbed
his relative and neighbor, Chaworth. They fought without
witnesses, in a tavern by candlelight. This case made a lot of noise, and the Chamber of Pens found the murderer guilty. He was however
released from punishment, [and] from then on lived at Newstead, where his quirks, stinginess and gloomy character made him the subject of gossip and slander.<…>
He tried to ruin his possessions out of hatred for his
heirs. His only interlocutors were the old servant and
the housekeeper, who also occupied another place with him. Moreover, the house was
full of crickets, which Lord William fed and raised.<…>
Lord William never entered into relations with his young
the heir, whose name was none other than the boy who lives in Aberdeen.”
The stingy and suspicious old lord with his housekeeper, crickets and reluctance to communicate with the heir is surprisingly similar to Onegin's relative, with one exception. Apparently, well-mannered English crickets were more trainable than the unceremonious and annoying Russian flies.
And Uncle Onegin’s castle, and “a huge neglected garden, a haven of brooding dryads,” and a werewolf housekeeper, and tinctures - all this was reflected, as in a crooked magic mirror, in N.V. Gogol’s “Dead Souls.” Plyushkin's house has become the image of a real castle from Gothic novels, smoothly moved into the space of post-modernist absurdity: somehow prohibitively long, for some reason multi-story, with rickety belvederes sticking out on the roof, it looks like a man who is watching the approaching traveler with his blind eyes-windows. The garden also resembles an enchanted place, in which the birch tree is rounded with a slender column, and the chapberry looks at the face of the owner. The housekeeper who meets Chichikov quickly turns into Plyushkin, and the liqueur and inkwell are full of dead insects and flies - aren’t they the ones that Onegin’s uncle crushed?
The provincial landowner-uncle with his housekeeper Anisya also appears in Leo Tolstoy’s “War and Peace.” Tolstoy's uncle noticeably improved, the housekeeper turned into a housekeeper, gained beauty, a second youth and a middle name, she was called Anisya Fedorovna. The heroes of Griboyedov, Pushkin and Gogol, migrating to Tolstoy, are transformed and acquire humanity, beauty and other positive qualities.
And another funny coincidence.
One of the features of Plyushkin’s appearance was his excessively protruding chin: “His face did not represent anything special; it was almost the same as that of many thin old men, one chin only protruded very far forward, so he had to cover it with a handkerchief every time, so as not to spit... - this is how Gogol describes his hero.
F.F. Vigel, memoirist, author of the famous and popular “Notes” in the 19th century, familiar with many figures of Russian culture, represents V.L. Pushkin as follows: “He himself is very ugly: a loose, fat body on thin legs, a slanting belly, a crooked nose, a triangle face, a mouth and chin, like a la Charles-Quint**, and most of all, thinning hair not more than thirty years he was old-fashioned. Moreover, toothlessness moistened his conversation, and his friends listened to him, although with pleasure, but at some distance from him.”
V.F. Khodasevich, who wrote about the Pushkins, apparently used Wiegel’s memoirs:
“Sergei Lvovich had an older brother, Vasily Lvovich. They were similar in appearance, only Sergei Lvovich seemed a little better. Both had loose, pot-bellied bodies on thin legs, sparse hair, thin and crooked noses; both had sharp chins sticking out forward, and pursed lips were a straw."
**
Charles V (1500 - 1558), Holy Roman Emperor. The Habsburg brothers Charles V and Ferdinand I had distinct family noses and chins. From the book “The Habsburgs” by Dorothy Geese McGuigan (translation by I. Vlasova): “Maximilian’s eldest grandson, Karl, a serious boy, not very attractive in appearance, grew up with his three sisters in Mechelen in the Netherlands. Blonde hair, smoothly combed, like a page’s, They only slightly softened the narrow, sharply cut face, with a long, sharp nose and an angular, protruding lower jaw - the famous Habsburg chin in its most pronounced form."
UNCLE VASYA AND COUSIN
In 1811, Vasily Lvovich Pushkin wrote the comic poem “Dangerous Neighbor.” A funny, although not entirely decent plot (a visit to the pimp and a fight started there), a light and lively language, a colorful main character (the famous F. Tolstoy - the American served as the prototype), witty attacks against literary enemies - all this brought the poem well-deserved fame. It could not be published due to censorship obstacles, but it was widely circulated in copies. Main character of the poem Buyanov is the narrator's neighbor. This is a man of a violent disposition, energetic and cheerful, a careless drinker who squandered his estate in taverns and entertainment with gypsies. He doesn't look very presentable:
Buyanov, my neighbor<…>
Came to me yesterday with an unshaven mustache,
Disheveled, covered in fluff, wearing a cap with a visor,
He came and it was like a tavern everywhere.
This hero A.S. Pushkin calls him his cousin (Buyanov is his uncle’s creation) and introduces him into his novel as a guest at Tatyana’s name day, without changing his appearance at all:
My cousin, Buyanov,
In down, in a cap with a visor
(As you know him, of course)
In EO he behaves as freely as in “Dangerous Neighbor”.
In the draft version, during the ball, he has fun with all his heart and dances so much that the floors crack under his heel:
... Buyanova heel
It breaks the floor all around
In the white version, he entices one of the ladies to dance:
Buyanov sped away to Pustyakova,
And everyone poured into the hall,
And the ball shines in all its glory.
But in the mazurka he played a peculiar role of fate, leading Tatiana and Olga to Onegin in one of the dance figures. Later, the arrogant Buyanov even tried to woo Tatyana, but was completely refused - how could this spontaneous cap-holder compare with the elegant dandy Onegin?
Pushkin is worried about the fate of Buyanov himself. In a letter to Vyazemsky, he writes: “Will something happen to him in his offspring? I am extremely afraid that my cousin will not be considered my son. How long before sin?” However, most likely, in this case, Pushkin simply did not miss the opportunity to play with words. In the EO, he accurately determined the degree of his relationship with Buyanov, and brought out his own uncle in the eighth chapter in a very flattering manner, giving a generalized image of a secular man of the past era:
Here he was in fragrant gray hair
The old man joked in the old way:
Excellently subtle and clever,
Which is a little funny these days.
Vasily Lvovich, indeed, joked “excellently subtly and cleverly.” He could defeat opponents to death with one verse:
The two stalwart guests laughed and reasoned
And Stern the New was called wonderfully.
Direct talent will find defenders everywhere!
The snake bit Markel.
He died? - No, the snake, on the contrary, died.
As for the “fragrant gray hairs,” one involuntarily recalls the story of P.A. Vyazemsky from the “Autobiographical Introduction”:
“Upon returning from the boarding house, I found Dmitriev, Vasily Lvovich Pushkin, the young man Zhukovsky and other writers with us. Pushkin, who even before his departure had already given an account of his travel impressions with Dmitriev’s pen, had just returned from Paris. He was dressed to the nines from head to toe; his hair was curled and anointed with ancient oil, huile antique. In simple self-praise, he let the ladies sniff his head. with a hint of mockery.<...>He was pleasant, not at all an ordinary poet. He was kind to infinity, to the point of ridiculousness; but this laughter is not a reproach to him. Dmitriev correctly portrayed him in his humorous poem, saying for him: “I am truly kind, ready to heartily embrace the whole world.”
AN UNCLE'S SENTIMENTAL JOURNEY
The humorous poem is “The Journey of N.N. to Paris and London, written three days before the trip,” created by I.I. Dmitriev in 1803. M. A. Dmitriev, his nephew, tells the story of the creation of this short poem in his memoirs “Little things from the stock of my memory”: “A few days before his (Vasily Lvovich) departure to foreign lands, my uncle, who was briefly acquainted with him back in guard service, described his journey in humorous verses, which, with the consent of Vasily Lvovich and with the permission of the censor, was published in Beketov’s printing house, under the title: N.N.’s journey to Paris and London, written three days before the trip. A vignette was attached to this publication, which depicts Vasily Lvovich himself in an extremely similar way. He is presented listening to Talma, who gives him a lesson in recitation. I have this book: it was not on sale and is the greatest bibliographic rarity.”
The joke was indeed a success, it was appreciated by A.S. Pushkin, who wrote about the poem in a short note “The Travel of V.L.P.”: “The journey is a cheerful, gentle joke on one of the author’s friends; late V.L. Pushkin went to Paris, and his infantile delight gave rise to the composition of a small poem in which the whole of Vasily Lvovich is depicted with amazing accuracy. “This is an example of playful lightness and jokes, lively and gentle.”
P.A. also rated “Journey” highly. Vyazemsky: “And the poems, although humorous, belong to the best treasures of our poetry, and it is a pity to keep them under wraps.”
From the first part
Friends! sisters! I am in Paris!
I started living, not breathing!
Sit closer to each other
My little magazine to read:
I was in the Lyceum, in the Pantheon,
Bonaparte bows;
I stood close to him,
Not believing my luck.
I know all the paths of the boulevard,
All new fashion stores;
At the theater every day, from here
In Tivoli and Frascati, in the field.
From the second part
Against the window in the sixth building,
Where are the signs, carriages,
Everything, everything, and in the best lorgnettes
From morning to evening in the darkness,
Your friend is sitting still not scratched,
And on the table where the coffee is,
"Mercury" and "Moniteur" are scattered,
There is a whole bunch of posters:
Your friend writes to his homeland;
But Zhuravlev won’t hear!
Sigh of the heart! fly to him!
And you, friends, forgive me for that
Something to my liking;
I'm ready whenever you want
Confess my weaknesses;
For example, I love, of course,
Read my verses forever,
Either listen or don’t listen to them;
I also love strange outfits,
If only it were in fashion, to show off;
But in a word, a thought, even a glance
Do I want to insult anyone?
I'm really kind! and with all my soul
Ready to hug and love the whole world!..
I hear a knock!.. is there any way behind me?
From the third
I'm in London, friends, and coming to you
I’m already extending my arms -
I wish I could see you all!
Today I'll give it to the ship
Everything, all my acquisitions
In two famous countries!
I'm beside myself with admiration!
What kind of boots will I come to you in?
What tailcoats! trousers!
All the latest styles!
What a wonderful selection of books!
Consider - I will tell you instantly:
Buffon, Rousseau, Mably, Cornelius,
Homer, Plutarch, Tacitus, Virgil,
All Shakespeare, all Pop and Hum;
Magazines of Addison, Style...
And all Didot, Baskerville!
The light, lively narrative perfectly conveyed the good-natured character of Vasily Lvovich and his enthusiastic attitude towards everything he saw abroad.
It is not difficult to see the influence of this work on EO.
TELL US, UNCLE...
A.S. Pushkin knew I. Dmitriev from childhood - he met him at his uncle’s house, with whom the poet was friends, read Dmitriev’s works - they were part of the study program at the Lyceum. Makarov Mikhail Nikolaevich (1789-1847) - a writer-Karamzinist, left memories of a funny meeting between Dmitriev and the boy Pushkin: “In my childhood, as far as I remember Pushkin, he was not one of the tall children and still had the same African facial features with which He was also an adult, but in his youth his hair was so curly and so elegantly curled by African nature that one day I. I. Dmitriev said to me: “Look, this is a real Arab.” The child laughed and, turning to us, said very quickly and boldly: “At least I will be distinguished by this and will not be a hazel grouse.” The hazel grouse and the arabian remained on our teeth the whole evening.”
Dmitriev was quite favorable towards the poems of the young poet, his friend’s nephew. A black cat ran between them after the publication of Pushkin’s poem “Ruslan and Lyudmila”. Contrary to expectations, Dmitriev treated the poem very unkindly and did not hide it. A.F. Voeikov added fuel to the fire by quoting Dmitriev’s personal oral statement in his critical analysis of the poem: “I see neither thoughts nor feelings here: I see only sensuality.”
Under the influence of Karamzin and the Arzamas people, Dmitriev tries to soften his harshness and writes to Turgenev: “Pushkin was a poet even before the poem. Although I am disabled, I have not yet lost my sense of grace. How can I want to humiliate his talent?" This seems like a kind of justification.
However, in a letter to Vyazemsky, Dmitriev again balances between compliments through gritted teeth and caustic irony:
“What can you say about our “Ruslan”, about whom they shouted so much? It seems to me that he is a half-baby of a handsome father and a beautiful mother (muse). I find in him a lot of brilliant poetry, ease in the story: but it’s a pity that he often falls into in burlesque, and it’s even more a pity that I didn’t put in the epigraph the famous verse with a slight change: “La mХre en dИfendra la lecture a sa fille”<"Мать запретит читать ее своей дочери". Без этой предосторожности поэма его с четвертой страницы выпадает из рук доброй матери".
Pushkin was offended and remembered the offense for a long time - sometimes he could be very vindictive. Vyazemsky wrote in his memoirs: “Pushkin, for we are, of course, talking about him, did not like Dmitriev as a poet, that is, it would be more correct to say, he often did not like him. Frankly, he was, or had been, angry with him. At least that's my opinion. Dmitriev, a classic - however, Krylov was also a classic in his literary concepts, and also French - did not very kindly welcome Pushkin’s first experiments, and especially his poem “Ruslan and Lyudmila”. He even spoke harshly and unfairly about her. Probably, this review reached the young poet, and it was all the more sensitive to him because the verdict came from a judge who towered above a number of ordinary judges and whom, in the depths of his soul and his talent, Pushkin could not help but respect. Pushkin in ordinary, everyday life, in everyday relationships, was inordinately kind-hearted and simple-hearted. But in his mind, under certain circumstances, he was vindictive, not only in relation to ill-wishers, but also to strangers and even to his friends. He, so to speak, strictly kept in his memory a ledger, in which he entered the names of his debtors and the debts that he accounted for them. To help his memory, he even substantially and materially wrote down the names of these debtors on scraps of paper, which I myself saw from him. This amused him. Sooner or later, sometimes quite by accident, he collected the debt, and collected it with interest.”
Having recovered with interest, Pushkin changed his anger to mercy, and in the thirties his relationship with Dmitriev again became sincere and friendly. In 1829, Pushkin sent I.I. Dmitriev the just published “Poltava”. Dmitriev responds with a letter of gratitude: “I thank you with all my heart, dear sir Alexander Sergeevich, for your gift, which is priceless to me. I’m starting to read right now, confident that when we meet in person I will thank you even more. Your devoted Dmitriev embraces you.”
Vyazemsky believes that it was Dmitriev who was brought out by Pushkin in the seventh chapter of EO in the image of an old man straightening his wig:
Having met Tanya at the boring aunt,
Vyazemsky somehow sat down with her
And he managed to occupy her soul.
And, noticing her near him,
About her, straightening my wig,
The old man inquires.
The characterization is quite neutral - not warmed by special sincerity, but also not destroying with deadly sarcasm or cold irony.
The same chapter is preceded by an epigraph from I. Dmitriev’s poem “Liberation of Moscow”:
Moscow, Russia's beloved daughter,
Where can I find someone equal to you?
But all this happened later, and while writing the first chapter of the EO, Pushkin was still offended, and who knows if, when writing the first lines of the EO, he remembered Uncle I.I. Dmitriev and his nephew M.A. Dmitriev, who in his critical articles acted as a “classic”, an opponent of new, romantic trends in literature. His attitude towards Pushkin’s poetry invariably remained restrained and critical, and he always bowed to his uncle’s authority. Mikhail Alexandrovich’s memories are simply replete with the words “my uncle,” to which one would like to add “the most honest rules.” And already in the second stanza of EO Pushkin mentions the friends of “Lyudmila and Ruslan”. But the ill-wishers remain unnamed, but implied.
By the way, I.I. Dmitriev enjoyed the reputation of an honest, exceptionally decent and noble person, and this was well deserved.
IN CONCLUSION A LITTLE MYSTICITY
An excerpt from the memoirs of Alexander Sergeevich’s nephew
Pushkin - Lev Nikolaevich Pavlishchev:
Meanwhile, Sergei Lvovich received privately from Moscow news of the sudden illness of his brother and also his dear friend, Vasily Lvovich.
Upon returning from Mikhailovskoye, Alexander Sergeevich stayed in St. Petersburg for a very short time. He went to Boldino and on his way visited Moscow, where he witnessed the death of his dearly beloved uncle, the poet Vasily Lvovich Pushkin...
Alexander Sergeevich found his uncle on his deathbed, on the eve of his death. The sufferer lay in oblivion, but, as his uncle reported in a letter to Pletnev dated September 9 of the same year, “he recognized him, grieved, then, after a pause, said: “How boring Katenin’s articles are,” and not a word more.
At the words spoken by the dying man, says Prince Vyazemsky, a witness of Vasily Lvovich’s last days in his memoirs, Prince Vyazemsky, who then came from St. Petersburg, “Alexander Sergeevich left the room to “let his uncle die historically; Pushkin,” Vyazemsky adds, “was, however, “I was very touched by this whole spectacle and behaved as decently as possible the whole time.”
My uncle has the most honest rules,
When I seriously fell ill,
He forced himself to respect
And I couldn't think of anything better.
EO, Ch. 1, I
What does it say? Is it possible to retell it in your own words?
These lines are often quoted, especially in the press. Let's say a goalkeeper takes a penalty kick - immediately an article appears about how he thereby “forced himself to be respected”! But venerable Pushkin scholars as one remain deathly silent on this matter.
“And everyone - absolutely everyone: fathers, mothers, grandmothers, grandfathers, children, grandchildren, actors, readers, directors, translators into other languages, and even Pushkin researchers - unanimously uttered nonsense about an uncle of high moral qualities, who finally forced himself to be respected , or began to look for another, fantastic meaning.”
Did you understand anything? I only understood that it was useless to climb into the Kalash row with a pig’s snout, trying to understand the meaning of the lines of our people’s poet. In other words, Pushkin is for God’s chosen researchers, who certainly know what and why he wrote, but do not want to explain it in their own words, since the subject of scientific dispute is too subtle for the uninitiated. By the way, instead of answering the question posed, the venerable Pushkin scholar chose to step aside, turning his attention to some mediocre proofreader who, after the word “ill,” once put a comma instead of a semicolon. And thereby killed Pushkin’s entire plan.
Well, perhaps - the scientist knows better. Only the question ultimately remained unanswered: what does the phrase “forced to respect myself” mean? At least with a comma, at least with something else... Is it really absolutely nothing?
I did not find an answer to this question in any phraseological or other dictionary. On one of the forums I happened to see a link to a book by M.I. Mikhelson “Russian thought and speech. Experience of Russian phraseology. Ours and Others' of the century before last. They say it’s there! I was delighted, rushed to search, managed to find it, opened it - alas... There is nothing there about it.
At the same time, many of the interlocutors immediately gave an answer that seems to me to be correct, and the rationale for which I will try to get to the bottom of a little later. That's how they were taught at school! Probably, once upon a time there were teachers who loved their subject and honestly tried to understand it. And even today, in the newly published versions of Onegin, here and there there are modern comments that neither Brodsky, nor Nabokov, nor Lotman had... But I wanted to “reinvent the wheel” myself.
The result of the “invention” is below.
Let's start with the "fair rules". All researchers point to Krylov’s fable “The Donkey and the Peasant,” whose tailed hero was precisely “the most honest of the rules.” They also say that even without this fable, this phraseology was recognizable in those days.
Let's remember the fable:
Man in the garden for the summer
Having hired Donkey, he assigned
Ravens and sparrows are chased by an impudent race.
The donkey had the most honest rules:
I am unfamiliar with neither predatory nor theft:
He didn’t profit from the owner’s leaf,
And it’s a shame to give the birds a treat;
But the peasant's profit from the garden was bad.
The donkey, chasing the birds, with all the donkey's legs,
Along all the ridges, up and down,
Such a gallop has risen,
That he crushed and trampled everything in the garden.
Seeing here that his work was wasted,
Peasant on the back of a donkey
He took out the loss with a club.
“And nothing!” everyone shouts: “Serves the cattle right!
With his mind
Should I take on this matter?
And I will say, not to stand up for the Donkey;
He is definitely to blame (and the settlement has been made with him),
But it seems that he is also wrong
Who instructed the Donkey to guard his garden.
Let me note that Krylov’s Donkey is a decent creature. After all, he “... is not familiar with rapacity or theft: he did not profit from a single piece of paper.” Ordered to keep watch - he goes and keeps watch as best he can. A kind of selfless and naive worker - we, as a rule, do not respect such people. And, worse than that, they hit you painfully! Honest Donkey, for example, was beaten on the back with a club... Only after that Krylov partially absolved him of the blame and noted that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to ask the dunce the Man, who foolishly hired the wrong performer.
Finally respected, in general.
Onegin, as we know, honored his uncle with the same epithets that Krylov gave his Donkey. What kind of troubles the old man had is not important: the main thing is that in the end he, too, “was seriously ill.” And - alas! - only when a person dies or, even worse, has already died, various kinds of “pleasants” begin to pour into him, which he so lacked during his life. As a sign of belated respect.
What does the word “respect” mean? According to Dahl's dictionary - “to honor, to honor, to sincerely recognize someone's merits; highly valued..." By the way, already in our time Faina Ranevskaya said: “In order to receive recognition, one must, even must, die”...
In my opinion, it was precisely this simple meaning that Pushkin put into Onegin’s mouth. It's simple - “forced to respect myself” means: “died”! Because this is a guaranteed way to hear something respectful about yourself, even from those who have always hated you.
All his life Onegin cared deeply about his uncle - as well as about everyone else. And he rushed to him solely “for the sake of money,” deep down in his soul sincerely wishing him to die (“When will the devil take you?”).
Suddenly he really got
Report from the manager
That uncle is dying in bed
And I would be glad to say goodbye to him.
After reading the sad message,
Evgeniy on a date right away
Swiftly galloped through the mail
And I already yawned in advance,
Getting ready, for the sake of money,
For sighs, boredom and deception
(And thus I began my novel);
Well, he really didn’t want to “amuse the half-dead”... And then - a gift of fate: my uncle turned out to be a great guy and quickly died even before his arrival!
But, having arrived at my uncle’s village,
I found it already on the table,
As a tribute to the ready land.
Onegin is completely sincerely grateful to him for this: after all, of all the options for the development of events, his uncle chose the ideal one!
And I couldn't think of anything better.
His example to others is science;
- Well done, old man! - Onegin grins to himself. - I respect you!
It's too early to rejoice. If everything is so good, then why this “But”:
His example to others is science;
But, my God, what a bore
Sitting with the patient...
And this no longer matters, since there is a semicolon before the “but”! The thought is finished, the next one begins. There is no opposition. Here is a similar example from the fifth chapter of the same “Onegin”:
What joy: there will be a ball!
The girls jump early;
But food was served.
EO, Chapter 5, XXVIII
The ball is not canceled by the upcoming dinner: there is simply a time for everything. So it is here: the death of the old uncle is not canceled out by reasoning about how disgusting Onegin would have been sitting with a lean face at his bedside. Bored Evgeny is prone to philosophizing and simply wonders what would happen if...
After reading the sad message,
Evgeniy on a date right away
Swiftly galloped through the mail
And I already yawned in advance,
Getting ready, for the sake of money,
For sighs, boredom and deception
(And thus I began my novel);
It turns out that hints of confidence in the uncle’s death seem to be inappropriate... But the novel begins not with the first stanza of the first chapter, but with the epigraph:
Eugene Onegin
Novel in verse
Pétri de vanité il avait encore plus de cette espéce d'orgueil qui fait avouer avec la méme indifference les bonnes comme les mauvaises actions, suite d'un sentiment de supériorite peut-être imaginaire.
Tire d'une lettre particuliere
Imbued with vanity, he also possessed that special pride that prompts him to admit with equal indifference both his good and bad deeds - a consequence of a sense of superiority, perhaps imaginary. From a private letter (French).
Thus, the first thing they tell us once again is that people like Onegin indifferently admit that they are doing wrong. Yes, Evgeny rushed headlong to sigh and lie for money. And only then, having become convinced that he had actually inherited his uncle’s farm, “the heir to all his relatives” immediately flew off somewhere “in the dust at the post office.” Where? Most likely, to a notary! Or settle things in the city before moving to the countryside for a long time. That is, in any case, not to the uncle, but from the uncle.
Impolite? There, the wake is in full swing: the priests and guests are eating and drinking... Yes, the “young rake” did not do very well. And what do you want from him: a rake, according to Dahl’s dictionary, is “an impolite, impudent naughty boy.”
So thought the young rake,
Flying in the dust on postage,
By the Almighty will of Zeus
Heir to all his relatives.
And from everything it is clear that Onegin is in a good mood. He did not have to humiliate himself in order to become the owner of “factories, waters, forests, lands.”
Now let’s try to write a mini-essay on the content of the first stanza in our own words.
My uncle is an honest but narrow-minded old worker. He, sensing his approaching death, died immediately, without causing any trouble to anyone. If everyone followed this example, then the world would get rid of the sanctimonious pretense of those who, for the sake of an inheritance, would be forced to hang around the bedsides of useless capricious patients, cursing everything in the world and thereby wanting to quickly go to hell!
It is clear that Pushkin expressed all this more gracefully and briefly.
By the way, one respected researcher of his work, whom I “turned on” with my interest in this issue, came to the conclusion that “I forced myself to respect” is an idiom introduced into use by Pushkin.
It may very well be. Therefore, you need to be careful with thoughtless quoting. The goalkeeper mentioned at the beginning, who took the penalty, may be offended by this. However, he is unlikely to be interested in such issues...
Instructions
First, you must understand that there are two ways to gain respect: through force and intimidation, or through your unique personality and intelligence. The second method is naturally more complicated. And the first one should not be considered because of its incorrectness.
Build your reputation. You are a worthy, strong person and everyone around you should understand this. And figure it out for yourself, because... boasting, even very veiled and neat, will not cause people’s respect, but contempt or pity. Live only the way you think is right, and don’t be afraid to be different from other people. Avoid overconfidence and verbosity. A simple, firm, calm “no” will command more respect than an angry tirade.
Keep yourself in shape. Your outer appearance should match your inner toughness. It's hard to command respect if you look like a balloon or a bun - so it's worth hitting the gym and getting in shape. Emphasize your inner seriousness with stylish and formal clothing. Pay special attention to accessories - a cheap tie and cufflinks with an expensive suit will look stupid. However, avoid showing off the high cost of your outfits. Show it naturally and slightly casually.
Be smart and extraordinary. High intelligence always commands respect, especially if it is combined with a successful career and interesting appearance. However, it is not always possible to demonstrate your high IQ. For such cases, unusual hobbies that speak of your originality are well suited. Skydive, climb Everest, kayak, etc. In this case, you will always be the center of attention and will be able to show your best side, demonstrating your intelligence and education. But never talk about a topic you don't understand. You can answer that you are far from this problem and are not an expert on the subject under discussion. Such honesty will most likely earn respect, but pathetic attempts to maintain a conversation on a topic that is little familiar to you can lead to ridicule or an unflattering conclusion about your short-sightedness.
Be prepared to defend your position. Conflict situations in life are not at all rare, and in this case you need to prove your reputation as a respected person. Don't compromise; make it clear that you don't approve of your opponent's views. Be confident and don't take your eyes off him. Answer directly and carefully. Keep yourself under control, even if the other person annoys you. Such behavior always evokes respect, unlike someone who foams at the mouth to prove that he is right.
And lastly, respect others. You will never be able to make people respect you if you do not treat deserving individuals accordingly. Show them that you are interested and their opinion is important, show interest in them, empathize, and then they will answer you in kind.
Sources:
- how to make her respect me
The need for recognition from others is one of the leading needs in humans. The quality of life of a respected person is much higher than that of people who do not enjoy authority. To make others respect you, you need to change your behavior and worldview.
Some people confuse respect with fear. A thug with bulging muscles who doesn't know how to behave is a cause for concern. The object of respect is an intelligent, strong, educated person who has neither a sense of humor nor the ability to empathize.
To gain respect, you must demonstrate positive qualities that are valued in society. Treat other people the way you want to be treated. Even if the person is you, show restraint and do not stoop to his level. By doing this you will show him and those around him that he humiliated himself first of all.
Celebrate the victories and achievements of those around you. In conversation, emphasize the merits of your colleagues and friends, not your own. But don't become . If you have a negative opinion, express it correctly and openly.
Even if you are completely confident in yourself, always listen to the opinions of others. Show your interlocutors that you are interested in them. Respect people and they will give you the same respect.
Constantly develop and learn something new. A person must constantly grow: a person who has stopped developing quickly begins to degrade over time. Learn languages, travel, get involved in sports - and you will always be a welcome guest and interlocutor.
Develop leadership skills. Start small - organize a corporate or family event. At work, make suggestions, don’t be afraid to take responsibility, and don’t remain silent when proactive workers are needed.
Emphasize your strengths and do not expose your weaknesses. If you don’t understand the subject of the conversation, say so, rather than invent non-existent facts. But if the conversation touches on your area of knowledge, don’t get confused and prove yourself to be a competent, educated interlocutor.
Don't neglect your appearance either. Keep in good physical shape, buy quality clothes. Your behavior should correspond to your appearance and status - do not fuss, behave calmly and confidently in any situation.
In addition to all the techniques described above, your inner attitude is also important. If you want others to respect you, first of all, respect yourself. Don’t get hung up on failures, which happen to even the most authoritative people. But strong and respected people, unlike weak ones, know how to admit mistakes and move forward.
Sources:
- how others will respect me
Starting to love yourself is not that difficult. It is much more difficult to learn self-respect. This will allow you to always stay afloat and find strength in any, even the most difficult situations. All that remains is to figure out how to start respecting yourself.
Always keep your promises. Otherwise, you may forget about self-respect forever. Conscience always remembers our mistakes and will not let us forget them so easily. It is impossible to respect yourself if you let other people down. What authority can a deceiver have? Far from the tallest.
Remember all the promises you have ever made, write them down on a piece of paper and try to fulfill them as quickly as possible. If for objective reasons this cannot be done, then at least try to simply apologize to the person.
Achieve your goals. This will not only allow you to start respecting yourself, but will also develop your self-confidence, willpower and increase your level of motivation. To begin with, you can set simple goals that are not particularly difficult to achieve. But then the complexity should grow, and with it your self-esteem. Try setting some challenging goal with a very limited time frame. Having dealt with it, you will receive an unprecedented charge of energy and self-satisfaction.
Evaluate yourself objectively. Perhaps the reason you have low self-esteem is that you are too judgmental of yourself. Try to describe yourself without resorting to prejudice. You will see that there are enough sides to your character that are worthy of respect.
Respect baby towards the people around him, their work, opinions and personal life begins with his respect for his parents. But it cannot arise out of nowhere; respect must begin to be instilled from the first days of the baby’s life.
Instructions
There is no need to interrogate him about where he goes. He will tell you himself when he considers it necessary. There is no need to speak in an impolite tone about his parents; it is better to admire his mother, who raised her son so amazingly.
Try to wear your favorite robe and slippers as little as possible. It is better to do light makeup, hairstyle, and choose a nice dress before your arrival. And also treat with understanding and respect everything that concerns his work. After all, he is a man, a breadwinner!
Watch football with him, you can even name several football players by last name. This will extremely surprise your chosen one, but will also raise you in his eyes. Also, don’t forget about boxing. Casually ask if he forgot about the championship tournament (although before that you yourself will have to sit in).
Learn to find compromises, give in, but you also don’t need to indulge in everything. After all, you know your worth, and you need to maintain your status. Then your significant other will begin to realize how lucky he is in life. What an amazing woman he got. And his main task in life is this gift of fate is nearby. And for this the woman needs to be happy.
note
If you need something from a person, speak directly, without prevarication. If you are asked a specific question, then you need to provide a specific answer, without unnecessary words. I hope you can make people respect you. But it’s better not to force them, but simply to change yourself, so that they themselves want to respect you. Rules for real men.
Helpful advice
Make it a rule to express your feelings gently and calmly. Accusing a man of not respecting you when you have never told him what exactly is affecting you is not reasonable. Be clear about your needs. If a man deliberately ignores you, then be firm and make it clear that you will not tolerate such behavior. Of course, there are incorrigible men on whom it is simply a pity to waste time, energy and nerves. It's better to stay away from them. How to make a man respect you -.
Many people want to be valued and respected. This does not happen by chance, because a respected person feels more comfortable in society, and there are much fewer problems in his life than for someone who is used to not paying attention.
Instructions
Before you start gaining everyone's respect, think about who you currently are in . Do people turn to you for advice, do people listen to your opinion? If not, try to find the reason for this: it may lie either in your alienation from people, or in the fact that you are perceived as not strong and wise enough.
Imagine and try to imagine why people would respect you. Draw a mental picture of “yourself”: a strong, confident, reasonable person. This image should be fixed in your head, and only after this happens, serious changes can begin to occur in your life.
Try to think independently, read more and don’t miss information programs. You don't need to be proficient in every area, but it's a good idea to become proficient in a few. People who know something well are treated with respect.
In order to achieve respect from others, become, that is, learn to cope and get out of difficult situations with dignity. Don’t be afraid to part with and change your point of view - only strong people can admit their mistakes. Think about what is most important to you, develop a kind of code and strictly follow it.
Don't be lazy. Work and be on the move. However, this does not mean that you should rush somewhere: you must always maintain calm, regardless of whether you are in a hurry or not. People who can control their emotions are respected because they appear wise.
And lastly, do not overdo it in trying to win someone's respect, otherwise you risk becoming a slave to your idea, in addition, becoming dependent on his desires and ideals. And people, as you know, are not respected.