What happens to the body on day 9. What to do for a year after the funeral

18.10.2019

Please explain what the 3rd, 9th and 40th day after the death of a person mean. What is the soul of the deceased experiencing and where is it these days?

Priest Afanasy Gumerov, resident of the Sretensky Monastery, answers:

Our earthly existence is a preparation for the future life: “it is appointed for men to die once, but after this the judgment” (Heb. 9:27). Post-mortem experiences indicate that, freed from bodily fatness, the soul becomes more active. The trials she undergoes immediately after being separated from her body have spiritual and moral nature. Everything she did, good and bad, remains. Therefore, for the soul, from the very beginning of the afterlife (even before the Judgment), joys or suffering begin, depending on how it lived on earth. St. John Cassian writes: “the souls of the dead not only do not lose their feelings, but do not lose their dispositions, i.e. They are already beginning to anticipate hope and fear, joy and sorrow, and something of what they expect for themselves at the general judgment, contrary to the opinion of some infidels, that after leaving this life they are destroyed into nothing; they become even more alive and cleave more zealously to the glorification of God” (Conversation 1, chapter 14). In the first two days, freed from the mortal body, the soul enjoys freedom and can visit those places on earth that were dear to it. But on the third day she ends up in other areas. The revelation given by an angel to Saint Macarius of Alexandria (who died in 395) is known: “When on the third day there is an offering in the Church, the soul of the deceased receives from the angel guarding it relief from the grief that it feels from separation from the body; receives because praise and offerings in the Church of God have been made for her, which is why good hope is born in her. For for two days the soul, together with the angels who are with it, is allowed to walk on the earth wherever it wants. Therefore, the soul that loves the body sometimes wanders around the house in which it was separated from the body, sometimes around the coffin in which the body is laid<...>And a virtuous soul goes to those places in which it used to create the truth. On the third day, the One who rose from the dead on the third day - the God of all - commands, in imitation of His Resurrection, every Christian soul to ascend to heaven to worship the God of all. So, the good Church is in the habit of making an offering and prayer for the soul on the third day. After worshiping God, He is commanded to show the soul the various and pleasant abodes of the saints and the beauty of paradise. The soul considers all this for six days, marveling and glorifying the Creator of all this - God. Contemplating all this, she changes and forgets the sorrow that she had while in the body. But if she is guilty of sins, then at the sight of the pleasures of the saints she begins to grieve and reproach herself, saying: “Alas” for me! How I fussed in that world! Carried away by the satisfaction of lusts, I spent most of my life in carelessness and did not serve God as I should, so that I too could be rewarded with this goodness<...>After considering all the joys of the righteous for six days, she is again lifted up by the angels to worship God. So, the Church does well by performing services and offerings for the deceased on the ninth day. After the second worship, the Lord of all again commands to take the soul to hell and show it the places of torment located there, the different departments of hell and the various torments of the wicked.<...>Through these various places of torment the soul rushes for thirty days, trembling, so as not to be condemned to imprisonment in them. On the fortieth day she again ascends to worship God; and then the Judge determines the proper place for her affairs<...>So, the Church acts correctly by making remembrances of the departed and those who have received Baptism” (St. Macarius of Alexandria. The Sermon on the Exodus of the Souls of the Righteous and Sinners..., - “Christian Reading”, 1831, part 43, pp. 123-31; “How to conduct soul for the first forty days after leaving the body, M., 1999, pp. 13-19).

Fear of the unknown is a natural reaction that forces even the most notorious atheist, even to a minimal extent, to believe and adhere to certain rules of behavior during the process, before and after the funeral.

In order to help the soul of the deceased easily leave the material world, you need not only to know the recommendations, but also to understand them deep meaning. Not everyone knows how to behave correctly if such grief occurs in a family. Therefore, we have compiled a detailed article describing the rules of what you can and cannot do.

In Orthodoxy, wakes after death are held 3 times. On the third day after death, on the ninth, fortieth. The essence of the ritual lies in the funeral meal. Relatives and friends gather at a common table. They remember the deceased, his good deeds, stories from his life.

— On the 3rd day after death (the funeral is also held on the same day), everyone gathers to honor the memory of the deceased. The Christian is first taken to the funeral ceremony in a church or cemetery chapel. The unbaptized deceased, after saying goodbye to home, are immediately taken to the cemetery. Then everyone returns to the house for the wake. The family of the deceased does not sit at this memorial table.

— In the first seven days after a person’s death, do not take any things out of the house.

— On the 9th day after death, relatives go to the temple, order a memorial service, set a second memorial table at home, and only close relatives are invited to honor the memory of the deceased. The funeral is reminiscent of a family dinner, with the difference that the photo of the deceased is located not far from the refectory table. Next to the photograph of the deceased they place a glass of water or vodka and a slice of bread.

— On the 40th day after the death of a person, a third memorial table is held, everyone is invited. On this day, those who were unable to attend the funeral usually come to the wake. At church I order Sorokoust - forty liturgies.

- From the day of the funeral until the 40th day, remembering the name of the deceased, we must pronounce a verbal formula-amulet for ourselves and all the living. At the same time, the same words are a symbolic wish for the deceased: "Rest in peace to him", thereby expressing wishes for his soul to end up in heaven.

— After the 40th day and over the next three years, we will say a different wish formula: "The kingdom of heaven be upon him". Thus, we wish the deceased an afterlife in paradise. These words should be addressed to any deceased, regardless of the circumstances of his life and death. Guided by the biblical commandment “Judge not, lest ye be judged”.

- During the year following the death of a person, none of the family members has the moral right to take part in any holiday celebration.

- None of the family members of the deceased (including the second degree of kinship) could get married during the period of mourning.

- If a relative of the 1st -2nd degree of relationship has died in the family and not a year has passed since his death, then such a family does not have the right to paint eggs red for Easter (they must be white or some other color - blue, black , green) and accordingly take part in the celebrations of Easter night.

— After the death of her husband, the wife is prohibited from washing anything for a year on the day of the week on which the disaster occurred.

— For a year after death, everything in the house where the deceased lived remains in a state of peace or permanence: repairs cannot be made, furniture cannot be rearranged, nothing is given away or sold from the deceased’s belongings until the soul of the deceased reaches eternal peace.

- Exactly one year after death, the family of the deceased celebrates a memorial meal (“I please”) - the 4th, final memorial family-tribal table. It must be remembered that the living cannot be congratulated on their birthday in advance, and the final memorial table should be arranged either exactly a year later, or 1-3 days earlier.

On this day you need to go to the temple and order a memorial service for the deceased, go to the cemetery and visit the grave.

As soon as the last funeral meal is completed, the family is again included in the traditional scheme of holiday regulations of the folk calendar, becomes a full member of the community, and has the right to take part in any family celebrations, including weddings.

— A monument can be erected on a grave only after a year has passed after the person’s death. Moreover, it is necessary to remember golden rule folk culture: “Don’t graze the soil of Pakravou and Radaunschy.” This means if the year of the deceased fell at the end of October, i.e. after the Intercession (and for the entire subsequent period up to Radunitsa), then the monument can only be erected in the spring, after Radunitsa.

— After installing the monument, the cross (usually a wooden one) is placed next to the grave for another year, and then thrown away. It can also be buried under a flower bed or under a gravestone.

- You can get married after the death of one of the spouses only after a year. If a woman got married a second time, then the rightful owner-owner new husband became only seven years later.

— If the spouses were married, then after the husband’s death the wife took his ring, and if she never married again, then both wedding rings were placed in her coffin.

- If the husband buried his wife, then she wedding ring remained with him, and after his death, both rings were placed in his coffin, so that, having met in the Kingdom of Heaven, they would say: “I brought our rings with which the Lord God crowned us.

— For three years, the birthday of the deceased and the day of his death are celebrated. After this period, only the day of death and all annual church holidays commemorating ancestors are celebrated.

Not all of us know how to pray, much less know prayers for the dead. Learn a few prayers that may help your soul find peace after an irreparable loss.

Visiting a cemetery throughout the year

During the first year and all subsequent years, you can go to the cemetery only on Saturdays (except for the 9th, 40th day after death and church holidays honoring ancestors, such as Radunitsa or Autumn Grandfathers). These are church-recognized days of remembrance of the dead. Try to convince your relatives that they should not constantly visit the grave of the deceased, as they are harming their health.
Visit the cemetery before 12 noon.
The way you come to the cemetery is the same way you return.

Meat Saturday is the Saturday in the ninth week before Easter.
Ecumenical Parents' Saturday- Saturday in the second week of Lent.
Ecumenical Parental Saturday is the Saturday in the third week of Lent.
Ecumenical Parental Saturday is the Saturday in the fourth week of Lent.
Radunitsa - Tuesday in the second week after Easter.
Trinity Saturday is the Saturday in the seventh week after Easter.
Dmitrievskaya Saturday - Saturday in the third week after.

How to dress appropriately for a death anniversary?

Clothes for a death anniversary are of no small importance. If you are planning a trip to the cemetery before the funeral dinner, you should take weather conditions into account. To attend church, women need to prepare a headdress (scarf).

Dress formally for all funeral events. Shorts, deep necklines, bows and ruffles will look indecent. It is better to exclude bright, variegated colors. Business, office suits, closed shoes, formal dresses in muted tones are an appropriate choice for a funeral date.

Is it possible to make repairs after a funeral?

According to signs not related to Orthodoxy, repairs in the house where the deceased lived cannot be done within 40 days. No changes can be made to the interior. In addition, all belongings of the deceased must be thrown away after 40 days. And on the bed on which a person died, his blood relatives are generally not allowed to sleep. From an ethical point of view, repairs will only refresh the state of those grieving. It will help you get rid of things that remind you of the person. Although many, in memory of a departed loved one, strive to keep something that belonged to him. According to signs, this is again not worth doing. Therefore, repair will be a good solution in all cases.

Is it possible to clean up after a funeral?

While the deceased is in the house, you cannot clean or take out the trash. According to legends, it is believed that the rest of the family members will die. When the deceased is removed from the house, the floor must be thoroughly washed. Blood relatives are prohibited from doing this. Orthodox Church also denies this point and considers it superstition.

The hour comes when the remains of the deceased are buried in the earth, where they will rest until the end of time and the general resurrection. But the love of the Mother of the Church for her child who has departed from this life does not dry out. On certain days, she makes prayers for the deceased and makes a bloodless sacrifice for his repose. Special days commemorations - the third, ninth and fortieth (in this case, the day of death is considered the first). Commemoration on these days is sanctified by ancient church custom. It is consistent with the teaching of the Church about the state of the soul beyond the grave.

Third day

The commemoration of the deceased on the third day after death is performed in honor of the three-day resurrection of Jesus Christ and in the image of the Most Holy Trinity.

For the first two days, the soul of the deceased is still on earth, passing along with the Angel accompanying it through those places that attract it with memories of earthly joys and sorrows, evil and good deeds. The soul that loves the body sometimes wanders around the house in which the body is placed, and thus spends two days like a bird looking for a nest. A virtuous soul walks through those places in which it used to do the truth. On the third day, the Lord commands the soul to ascend to heaven to worship Him - the God of all. Therefore, the church commemoration of the soul that appeared before the face of the Just One is very timely.

Ninth day

The commemoration of the deceased on this day is in honor of the nine ranks of angels, who, as servants of the King of Heaven and representatives to Him for us, petition for pardon for the deceased.
After the third day, the soul, accompanied by an Angel, enters the heavenly abodes and contemplates their indescribable beauty. She remains in this state for six days. During this time, the soul forgets the sorrow that it felt while in the body and after leaving it. But if she is guilty of sins, then at the sight of the pleasure of the saints she begins to grieve and reproach herself: “Woe is me! How much I have become fussy in this world! I spent most of my life in carelessness and did not serve God as I should, so that I too would be worthy of this grace and glory. Alas for me, poor one!” On the ninth day, the Lord commands the Angels to again present the soul to Him for worship. The soul stands before the throne of the Most High with fear and trembling. But even at this time, the Holy Church again prays for the deceased, asking the merciful Judge to place the soul of her child with the saints.

Fortieth day

The forty-day period is very significant in the history and tradition of the Church as the time necessary for preparation and acceptance of the special Divine gift of the gracious help of the Heavenly Father. The Prophet Moses was honored to talk with God on Mount Sinai and receive the tablets of the law from Him only after a forty-day fast. The Israelites reached the promised land after a forty-year journey. Our Lord Jesus Christ Himself ascended into heaven on the fortieth day after His resurrection. Taking all this as a basis, the Church established commemoration on the fortieth day after death, so that the soul of the deceased would ascend the holy mountain of Heavenly Sinai, be rewarded with the sight of God, achieve the bliss promised to it and settle in the heavenly villages with the righteous.
After the second worship of the Lord, the Angels take the soul to hell, and it contemplates the cruel torment of unrepentant sinners. On the fortieth day, the soul ascends for the third time to worship God, and then its fate is decided - according to earthly affairs, it is assigned a place to stay until Last Judgment. That's why it's so timely church prayers and commemorations on this day. They atone for the sins of the deceased and ask for his soul to be placed in paradise with the saints.

Anniversary

The Church commemorates the deceased on the anniversary of their death. The basis for this establishment is obvious. It is known that the largest liturgical cycle is the annual circle, after which all the fixed holidays are repeated again. Anniversary of death loved one always celebrated with at least a heartfelt remembrance by his loving family and friends. For an Orthodox believer, this is a birthday for a new, eternal life.

A special place in Orthodox rites is occupied by the remembrance of the dead. The most important days are considered to be from 1 to 40 days, 9 days after death have eigenvalue. What do relatives need to do, what does this date mean?

A worthy send-off

The passing of a loved one is always a shock, even if he was old, had been ill for a long time and was preparing to move on to another world. Faced with the fact that only a motionless shell remains of a loved one, many think that they themselves are mortal. Existence beyond the border seems frightening. After all, on this side we can only guess about what awaits us there. But thanks to the teaching of the Church, we are still in general outline we know what happens on the 9th day after death. On this day the air ordeals begin.

What is it? It is believed that the soul goes through all the sins committed during life. It is especially important in the period from 9 to 40 days after death to support a loved one with intense prayer. Many important things need to be done, the main thing is that earthly concerns do not overshadow the care of the soul. For her, prayers are like passing marks on an exam, only it can be retaken, and the transition to another world is carried out only once.

If the death occurred on the 1st, the 9th day will come on the 9th (and not the 10th, if ordinary addition were used). Perhaps this rule is due to the fact that spiritual world Our usual measures of things do not apply.

What needs to be done?

The most hectic days are over, the funeral service, burial, and first wake took place. For 9 days after death, you can take up worthy Christian remembrance with great zeal. It consists of two parts - church and private prayer, everything else is less important, although the table must be organized if necessary.

Church remembrance: magpie (if not ordered earlier), Psalter for the repose (in monasteries you can order a version that is read around the clock), requiem service.
Private prayer: reading the Psalter, this can be any kathisma, but in general it is customary to read the 17th for repose. Personal presence at the Liturgy, memorial service. You can read the memorial service over the grave, take an abbreviated text for the laity.

Giving alms is considered very beneficial for the soul. You can take food to a church house, donate clothes that are no longer needed (sometimes things of the deceased are also given away). At the same time, people must be asked to pray for the remembrance of the soul of the deceased.

Feast

After completing the prayers that should be offered 9 days after death, the remaining time can be spent at the funeral meal. Real Christian funerals not only exclude vodka, alcohol is not allowed at all. This order is due to the fact that prayers should be continued even at the table. The topic of conversation should be the good qualities of the deceased, the good deeds that he did during his lifetime. You shouldn’t be too upset or cry. This won't make things any easier.

You can organize a wake anywhere - in a cafe or in an apartment, it doesn’t matter. Tables can be decorated with mourning ribbons. However, you should avoid artificial jewelry. Christians place only arrangements of fresh flowers in churches and on funeral tables. They symbolize life that is not interrupted.

The dishes should be simple. Required dishes:

sweet rice or wheat porridge (kolivo);
pancakes (also sweet);
jelly.

Sweetness symbolizes the pleasures in paradise that the righteous enjoy. Also, during the wake on the 9th day after death, you can serve a dish that the deceased loved.

Pointless activities in the cemetery should be avoided:

place a glass of vodka on the grave or on the table, even if the deceased liked to drink;
pour alcohol on the grave;
leaving money and things in the cemetery - it is better to donate them to the poor, who will be able to gratefully remember the deceased in their prayers.

You need to know that church commemoration is performed only for the baptized; you must try to find out this fact. People born before the 2nd World War, as a rule, are all baptized. If a person wore a cross but did not go to church, prayers should be intensified. After all, a Christian who has not gone to church for more than a month is already considered an apostate.

Candles can be lit for those who died as a result of the sin of suicide. But you can no longer submit notes. This should not be done with the help of deception - this can even harm the deceased. By consciously rejecting the church during life, refusing God's gifts, a person makes his own choice, no matter how sad it is to realize this. At 9 days after death, intensive prayers should begin, which will continue until the very day of the preliminary judgment of the soul.

The Importance of Spiritual Life

Many holy fathers were awarded various revelations, about which they compiled special works. From there it is known exactly how the soul ascends to the heavenly abodes. How more people will sincerely ask for the deceased, the easier it will be for her to be on the other side.

On the 9th day after death, the soul begins to undergo tests of all possible passions. There are 20 species in total. There is both theft and carnal pleasures, even such a seemingly insignificant sin as idle talk, slander, swearing. Various ordeals are dedicated to written works, icons. Horrifying images of pain and torment evoke rather unpleasant feelings.

But it is quite possible that demons will not frighten, but, on the contrary, seduce the soul flying by. Trying to detain her, to lure her with what she loved very much during her life. A very important lesson here is that the sinful soul independently chooses the path to hell, not to God. The Lord is not angry with people - they themselves turn away from Him by submitting to their passions.

Passion differs from sin in that it can enslave a person, force him to strive at any cost to satisfy his destructive desires. No wonder this word is translated as “suffering.” After all, getting what you really wanted does not make a person happy. He only rejects rewards beyond the grave, because there too he will be subject to evil influence. Only it will be a thousand times stronger.

When 9 days come after death, this means that the spirit ascends to worship the Lord. After this, until the forties, the soul is shown the hellish abyss and it is tormented by the evil deeds that it committed during its life. The fervent prayer of your neighbors can ease these wanderings, which can plunge you into horror and despair. While on earth, a person can educate his soul. There are proven means for this - fasting, prayer, different types abstinence. It will no longer be possible to resort to them for the coffin.

Being in the body, a Christian can get a respite from the feelings that overwhelm him - be it anger or lust. Simple sleep or a change in activity helps. Freed from the body, he will perceive spiritual reality much more acutely. On the other side, the soul is attracted to what it wanted here on earth. So she can fall into the clutches of demons. Prayers and fasting can get rid of them, which loved ones must undertake if they want to alleviate the fate of the deceased.

It is very important to understand that simply by submitting a note and standing at the Liturgy, you are only performing a ritual. It will be filled with meaning and become effective only when a person forces himself to put his whole soul into prayer.

Why is it necessary to remember the dead on day 9?

A wake is an important ritual for all people, regardless of religion. In Orthodoxy, it is customary to remember the deceased on the day of the funeral, as well as on the ninth and fortieth days. The countdown starts from the day of death. Even if a person died closer to midnight, they still count from that day.

For example, the day of death falls on the fifth of April, then the nine-day commemoration will take place on the thirteenth of April, and the forty-day commemoration will take place on the fourteenth of May. Be sure to do them every day.

The question arises: why nine days? According to the number of angels who ask the Lord God to forgive the deceased his sins. In Orthodoxy it is believed that the first two days after death the soul is separated from the body. Together with the angels, she walks the earth, visiting close people and places dear to her. On the third day, relief comes, which is given by the angel, since the psalter is read all three days, and everyone prays for the soul of the deceased.

The soul ascends to the Lord for worship. Then, until the ninth day, the angels show the beauties of paradise. On the ninth day the soul again ascends to the Lord for worship. Then she is sent to hell, where she remains until the fortieth day. It is also believed that during this period all the good deeds and all the sins that the deceased committed during his lifetime are remembered. Relatives and friends pray for the soul to withstand all trials and for the forgiveness of sins.

On this day, relatives should visit the temple, order a service, light candles and pray. Candles are placed on a special memorial table - eve. It stands on the north side, near the crucifixion of Christ. It is important to remember that candles are not lit for repose on Holy Week.

On the memorial day, you can order a memorial service, prayer service or lithium. It is necessary to go to the cemetery, remember the person and lay flowers. Under no circumstances should you have a meal in a cemetery, much less drink alcoholic beverages. All family and friends should know that no one is invited to the wake. Those who remember come, who want to pray for the deceased on this day.

Kutya must be placed on the table. This funeral dish is a porridge made from wheat, barley or rice, with the addition of honey, raisins, and nuts. Kutya, if desired, can be consecrated in the temple.

Many people, when organizing a funeral, are only concerned with the amount of food so that everyone is full. You should not place any culinary delights on the table. Dishes should be easy to prepare. First, second, no appetizers or salads. Drinks are required, but not alcohol. Baked goods and sweets are allowed.

You must behave modestly; laughter, jokes, songs and any fun are excluded. Do not forget that family members are in mourning. You cannot speak badly about the deceased, or talk about personal topics.

The meal begins with prayer. It is advisable that everyone pray for the deceased, otherwise there is no point in coming. People do not go to a wake to eat or discuss the latest worldly news: one should respect the grief of relatives.

Appearance

There are certain requirements for appearance. Men come in strict dark suits, with their heads uncovered. Women in modest dresses, headscarves. At the table you can talk about the deceased, about his past successes and merits, and remember pleasant moments. A calm, peaceful atmosphere in the house will have a beneficial effect on everyone present.

People don't always have the opportunity to organize a funeral. In this case, you can simply treat your neighbors, friends, employees at work, and children. To do this, just bake a cake or cookies, buy candy and other sweets. This way you can remember the deceased on any day.

IN Lent The funeral is being postponed until the weekend. If you want to bring flowers, you should leave them at the grave.

On memorial day, it is important to give alms to people in need. At the end of the meal, the remaining food must be distributed. It is strictly forbidden to throw away food. It is advisable to remember this during the cooking process.

The ninth day of remembrance is not a formal event. According to Orthodox canons, it is prayers on memorial days that help the soul find eternal peace. Everyone who goes to a funeral should remember this.