There are people who exist for us as images - stage and screen. They seem to wake up and fall asleep there: on TV.
In fact, they wake up and fall asleep next to their loved ones. In a house whose foundation was created together.
On the eve of Valentine's Day, we managed to persuade not only those who were not used to interviews, but also their non-media halves to talk about personal things.
In conversation over delicious coffee are the families of Denis Kuryan, Alexey Khlestov, Sasha Nemo and Larisa Gribaleva.
Denis and Julia
Denis and Yulia Kuryan have been together for 6.5 years, and have been married for almost 6 years. Together they manage a production studio for creating presentation videos and a chain of coffee machines. Well, most importantly, they are the parents of Kiryusha (5 years old) and Milana (2.5 years old).
– Denis, you and Yulia had an interesting and beautiful story of meeting each other. Share!
Denis: The funny thing is that it was preserved on video. It was a December evening in 2007 in Zhodino at the BelAZ testing site. We filmed a New Year's video for BT there - how presenters in huge cars are carrying huge boxes to the audience. Yulia was invited as an actress whose car broke down according to the script, and Sergei Kukhto, Andrei Mukovozchik and I had to help her and take the BelAZ in tow. It seems that my help turned out to be the most effective, because I arranged Yulia’s personal life! (Smiles.)
– Julia, please tell us what was your first impression when meeting Denis?
Julia: At that time I worked in two jobs: in the regional executive committee and at the same time in a modeling agency - shows, filming, and so on. There was no time to watch TV, and I had no idea who Denis Kuryan was. Yes, as it turned out later, I used to watch the Eurovision broadcasts, which Denis commentated on. But the picture and the voice somehow didn’t fit together based on the way he was “hooligan” on air, I thought that Kuryan was such a freak with tattoos and dyed hair. And Denis somehow looked too neat, more like a bank employee than a presenter entertainment program.
– How did your relationship develop?
Denis: Well, although I really liked Julia at first sight, at that time I had a girlfriend. It all happened a little later, almost a year later, Julia invited me to officiate her best friend’s wedding. While preparing for this event, we began to communicate more closely, and then somehow it was decided that the next wedding would be ours.
- Julia, weren’t you worried about Denis’ media presence? After all, there is a common opinion that a man from the world of show business cannot be with one woman for a long time, much less remain faithful to her?
Julia: I don’t perceive Denis as some kind of “media” person, for me he is just my husband, my beloved person, and not a “media person”. It’s just his job, public. And then, today, due to the new specifics of Denis’s work, you can more often see him in the company of a director and cameraman or directors of plants and factories than with any models. Therefore, I am absolutely calm.
Denis: By the way, there was a funny incident at our wedding. At the end, each guest had to pass a candle, as if a symbol of the family hearth, and say a wish in one word. Aunt Yulina said “Fidelity” and for some reason blew out the candle... although she should have just passed it on to the next one. For 6 years now, this incident has been a topic for teasing each other.
Denis, you’ve probably met a lot of interesting girls in your work life. How was Julia different from them?
Denis: Of course, people are greeted by their appearance, and, as you understand, it was hard not to notice a girl with a height of 177 cm! But the main thing that immediately captivated me was that Yulia is a very positive and energetic person. Surely guys have been in situations when they invite a girl on a date, but there is nothing to talk about, awkward pauses arise, and you feel uncomfortable. This has never happened with Yulia, perhaps because we have the same views on life and many common interests. I immediately felt that this was “my” person.
- Julia, did you have any moments of doubt that Denis is definitely “your” man?
Julia: No, it wasn’t, and it’s not today, I just felt it. Reliable, with a sense of humor and a vision for the future, this is my “ideal”, which Denis corresponds to. Over these 6 years, Denis has become more mature, wiser, more patient, and I am even more confident in my choice.
- When you started living together, did you, as young couples often do, encounter domestic problems?
Denis: No, our apartment was so small that you could wash and vacuum it all while standing on the rug front door. (Smiles.)
The main thing is that both look at things the same way - we want cleanliness in the house - let's clean it together, even if it has to be done at night. It is clear that with the birth of my first child, Yulia took on most of the troubles, and I began to work even more intensely. I can do anything: change diapers, change clothes, feed, bathe, and cook simple porridge, but Yulia rarely used these skills of mine, she felt sorry for me.
Julia: It became more difficult and interesting for us when Kiryusha was born, and this happened 9 months and 2 days after the wedding. But, apparently, my mother’s example is in my genes. Dad is a military man, he served in completely different places - from the GDR to Buryatia. We couldn’t always be close, and my mother basically raised two children alone; my brother and I are only a year apart. And, naturally, she never reproached her husband for the fact that in some situations he could not be there: such a profession, such a fate. Denis and I have the same thing - I take on everyday issues and treat them with understanding. I wish all the girls not to “drill” their men over any everyday nonsense.
- You are supporters of partner childbirth, the attitude towards which in our society is still ambiguous. Tell us why this was the right decision for you?
Denis: This is the greatest happiness in life - to see your babies born. Thank God that I had the opportunity not to walk under the maternity hospital or sit with the telephone receiver waiting, but to see this miracle. After the weigh-in, I took both Kiryusha and Milana into the ward and then it was I who spent the next 20 minutes of their new life with them, waiting for Yulia to be brought in.
Julia: I felt comfortable and comfortable that my husband was nearby at that moment. He helped to breathe correctly, joked, supported, in general, he did what a real man should do in such a situation. Of course, we want more children, and I am sure that the next birth will also be a partnership.
- Share the rules and taboos of a happy family!
Julia: Our rules: have fun and relax in a way that is interesting for both; find time to be alone, without children; do not be shy to ask for forgiveness and take the first step; find a way to be happy under any circumstances!
Denis: Well, our taboos: do not blame and do not evaluate; do not raise your voice to your “other half”; don't forget about important dates family life; don't go to bed having quarreled and not made up
Alexey and Elena
According to singer Alexei Khlestov, his wife Elena is a true partner both in creativity and in business. And the listener is the most devoted and partial.
To all this she, of course, loving woman and a wonderful mother who creates the weather in the house. So that later her popular husband, in turn, would create the weather on stage.
Let’s ask them themselves what laws the Khlestov family lives by.
- Alexey, Elena, how and where did you find each other?
Alexey:
- In the Kingdom of Bahrain! Lena and I worked there in the early 2000s. True, in different teams.
And then one day the team in which Lena worked came to us for a rehearsal. As I remember now, I was singing Bryan Adams and the Backstreet Boys back then. The next fifteen years indicate that she apparently liked the way I did it!
Elena:
- Yes, then that same spark slipped between us. I am a classicist, not a pop artist. And I didn’t know such an artist as Alexei Khlestov at all. And accordingly, I was very skeptical.
But it was the same mistake that you later rejoice at. His insight amazed me! Well, what to hide: it still amazes me.
– Do you believe in the destiny of people for each other?
Alexey:
– Yes, I believe it. I believe in fate and that the stars align as intended. Every man is looking for not just a lover, but kindred spirit. I found her. And not just anywhere, but far from home. How can you not believe after this?
Elena:
- Agree! We were very closely connected from the very beginning. This way they can only tie from above.
We immediately found common ground, made sure that we looked at things the same way, and realized that we were close in spirit. I always tell Lesha: “You are my man!” And he answers me the same.
– Being a good wife for an artist and just a good wife are different stories, right?
Alexey:
– Yes, being a good wife for an artist is more than that. Here's Lena. She is not just a beloved woman, she is a creative unit. She has impeccable musical intuition: she feels what a song should be and knows how to present it to me.
She is aware of all my affairs and plans - support in what has already been done, and an ideological inspirer in what is still in the drawings.
We men are only outwardly such strong guys. But in reality, we need a strong rear. Especially artists!
To know that after working on stage and on camera, you can come to a person who loves and accepts you for who you are.
Lena is the keeper of the family hearth and mine peace of mind. She is engaged in home production of happiness.
– Elena, are these titles difficult for you?
Elena:
– Yes, perhaps more difficult than any business achievement. (Smiles.)
Therefore, I am always amused by the stereotypes that an artist’s wife is an idle creature, and a housewife is a woman who has settled down in life and can rest on her laurels.
This is work: to make you want to return home. So that the husband knows for sure: he is loved. For children to grow up good people.
And at the same time, you must not lose yourself as a woman and a person!
So the task is not easy. I didn’t even realize how much. But her decision is what makes me happy.
– How do you spend your family time?
Alexey:
– And we always have our family day – Sunday. After a week when every day is scheduled by the hour, this very Sunday saves us.
We try to spend this day with those closest to us: parents, godmothers or family friends. We are going to visit or children's entertainment centers. And we can even treat ourselves to something that we everyday life strict taboo: dessert, pizza or homemade hamburger!
But all this is not the point. The main thing: we just feel good together.
- How did you manage to maintain this feeling for 15 years?
Alexey:
– We always trusted each other and never abused this trust.
Elena:
“They also knew how to find a common denominator and remembered that this is exactly what is most important.”
Sasha and Sveta
Sasha Nemo - then still Alexander Efimik - met his wife Sveta fifteen years ago, when he had neither a stage name nor, in fact, a career on the big stage.
However, together Sasha and Sveta managed to overcome difficulties, make their wildest dreams come true and, most importantly, not lose each other along the way. How did they do it?
Now we'll find out!
– Sasha, tell us how you first saw Sveta?
Sasha:
- ABOUT! This interesting story. The first time Sveta and I saw each other was in 1999 at a festival in Novogrudok, where we arrived as students of the Grodno College of Arts. We were about 18 years old at that time. We walked around the city, chatted about something, smiled and ran away...
Of course, I didn’t forget Sveta and in college I looked for her with my eyes. But she studied at the choreography department, and there all the girls were like a match - in a black training uniform, with their hair tied up, exhausted from rehearsals. Can't tell the difference, by God!
You could get lost that way!
But then there was a student disco. And I, inviting you to slow dance The first girl I noticed on the site, I realized with surprise: so here she is, the same one!
– Sveta, when did you catch yourself thinking “so this is the one”?
Sveta:
– Probably at that moment, which Sasha cannot know about. We didn’t know each other, and the girl students near the assembly hall were whispering, “He’s such a talented boy – he sings like that, he sings like that!” I came closer, listened - and fell in love with the voice. Who then sang Serov’s song “I love you to tears.”
Then, when I saw the owner of the voice, I won’t hide it, I was somewhat disappointed by the discrepancy. (Laughs.)
But even then I thought: it’s okay, she’ll grow up! And he succeeded with interest!
- But before this happened, it was necessary to overcome the period of formation. How did you manage to go through it together?
Sasha:
– You know, it was this difficult period that brought us together most of all.
Sveta graduated from the College of Arts and continued her studies in the city of Mosty. I continued to study in Grodno, but had already received an offer to work with Finberg’s orchestra, and therefore constantly went to her, then to Minsk.
It would seem: what is the relationship between two very young guys who live in three cities?
But in fact, the distance made us appreciate every minute that we could spend together. And we dreamed of living together so much that when it finally happened, we were not afraid of everyday life - we shared one plate of pasta between two and were glad of it. This period taught me: you shouldn’t overestimate material things, no matter how much they cost.
Sveta:
- Yes, yes! When we arrived in Minsk, we had all our things: dishes, bed linen and a tape recorder. And we were so happy about every joint acquisition and achievement, every success of each other! It would be a huge mistake to refuse this and ruin everything.
I think so - fortunately! – didn’t happen, because we have always been not only lovers, but also friends. They advised, supported, and sincerely supported each other. It was interesting for us to grow together... And so we grew up. (Smiles.)
Having gone through both fire and water.
– What about copper pipes – with long tours and, of course, fans?
Sasha:
- And this too. Anything has happened in 15 years. But even if ambiguous situations arose, people show their love for the artist in every way! – Sveta never forgot how important common sense and trust are in relationships. God has given us great skill speak. And hear. Luckily, my wife and I know how to use them.
Sveta:
- It's true. But here’s what’s also important: Sasha talks about ambiguous situations, but I don’t even remember them! Honestly! I didn’t have time to record this and dwell on doubts, fears, and jealousy. My favorite thing (I'm a makeup artist with twelve years of experience), traveling to international competitions, communicating with interesting people– all this has always occupied a significant part of my life. And when I left to create beauty - for myself and others - Sasha, I think, also had something to think about and worry about! (Laughs.)
– Sasha (as he noted in one of the interviews. – Ed.) had to worry when you left for the maternity hospital. And both times!
Sasha:
- Oh yes. When Sveta gave birth to our eldest daughter, Anechka, I was incredibly worried. My wife was taken to the maternity hospital, and I was left completely alone. Alone with your thoughts.
Ani’s older brother reassured me. I think this is normal: for every man, the birth of his first child is a real emotional test. And he also needs someone to lend a shoulder.
But during the birth of my second daughter, Masha, I, unfortunately, was far away. I went to a concert in Ryazan. I was sure that I would have time to return, but I couldn’t. You can’t imagine how I scold myself for this!
He should have stood under the door of the chamber, but he stood on the stage...
Sveta:
– To be honest, I’m pleased that Sasha is so repentant. It's masculine!
But, perhaps, I’ll admit now: I sent him to that concert on purpose. Knowing already that I will give birth that day.
She also asked her parents and their eldest daughter not to sit with me, but to go for a walk. “Well,” they say, “be sure to call if anything happens!” “I’ll call, I’ll call.”
And when the door closed, I packed my things and went to the maternity hospital.
Why did I do this? Because it was calmer for both me and them. For the first time, I realized that my family was more worried than I was, and their excitement was passed on to me. I’m getting scared, I’m starting to feel sorry for myself... There’s no point in this!
- Sasha, your wife is brave...
Sasha:
- Exactly! And most importantly, he knows how to control emotions, pull himself together and maintain control in any situation. cool head. I've had problems with this my whole life!
Sveta:
- Well, you're being modest now. I don’t know if this will be a revelation, but I’ll say it anyway: Sasha, the boy I fell in love with, has really become a real man who knows how to make decisions and take responsibility for them. A dad to whom children come to look for answers - and find them.
Today you are a husband one can only dream of and a father one should be proud of.
Sasha:
– I’m happy to hear this!
– What is the secret of your family’s happiness?
Sasha:
– The fact that we always remembered: after any crisis comes a rise! The main thing is to wait out the difficult time together. And they also accepted that we were different, like... soda and vinegar! But that’s why the chemistry between us still happens!
Sveta:
– And also, probably, that our goal was not to “preserve, hold, tie”... But simply to live the way you feel. Raise children. And try to be happy!
– Is there anything you haven’t accomplished in these 15 years?
Sasha:
- Give birth to a third child!
Sveta:
- And get married. (Smiles.)
Alexander and Larisa
"It's okay, mom!" - Larisa Gribaleva can confidently say when answering questions about her creativity, business... and husband!
Larisa and Alexander have been together for about twenty years and are raising two beautiful children - Alisa and Arseny.
Alexander, unlike his famous wife, rarely gives interviews. But today the couple agreed to remember their story from the very beginning... And tell it to us!
– Larisa, Alexander, please share your story of how you met.
Larisa:
– We met Sasha when I was a student at BGUKI. It often happens that Minsk residents love to “hang out” in hostels, and that’s where the funniest groups gather. So our Minsk football player friends periodically came to visit us, one of whom was in love with my girlfriend. She, apparently, did not have strong feelings for him, since their relationship did not work out... But thanks to this acquaintance, Sasha and I met each other.
As I remember now, it was December 1st. Why did you remember? Because the guys made fun of us: they said that on this day they celebrate World Footballer’s Day every year.
Alexander:
- And you believed it? (Smiles.)
Larisa:
- Well, yes! They say: we will come to you about this and, if you don’t mind, we will take one good guy with us - he is a professional cameraman, he will film us. Very talented.
Alexander:
“That guy was me!” (Laughs.)
True, none professional operator I didn’t show up at that time. Maximum - a photographer.
Larisa:
“Nevertheless, this is where our friendship began.”
- Friendship?
Alexander:
– Yes, for about six months Larisa and I met as friends: we walked together, talked a lot, shared secrets with each other. We had a truly trusting relationship.
Larisa:
“I keep asking myself: maybe Sasha had such a wise masculine tactic, a strategy for conquest?” But he still won’t admit it to me and now, of course, he won’t admit it to you either... (Laughs.)
The fact is that in the initial period of our communication I was in a relationship with another guy. Also Sasha, by the way.
Alexander:
“But I was completely different, right?”
Larisa:
- The complete opposite. There was a musician there, the same one" creative personality". Words, flowers and serenades. But all this is for everyone. The relationship was painful, and despite the fact that it had outlived its usefulness, the breakup was difficult.
Therefore, I definitely didn’t expect “love at first sight and Brazilian passions”. Enough!
But communication with a man who knew how to listen, joke, and instead of strong drinks (as many guys did) brought strawberries and cream to the dorm, turned out to be really necessary for me.
- Alexander, did you look after Larisa beautifully?
Alexander:
– In the generally accepted understanding, probably not... I confess: I could have come on a date without flowers.
Larisa:
- And I ask: “Sasha, why are you without flowers?” And he responded: “But I bought you juice!” (Laughs.)
This is a man's concern.
– Was there a male initiative?
Larisa:
– This is a different story! Somehow, at the beginning of the relationship, I shared with Sasha that I didn’t want to live in a hostel anymore and was planning to rent an apartment. And he says to me: “So let’s shoot it together!” To be honest, I was confused even by such a proposal. But I couldn’t or didn’t want to refuse!
Alexander:
“That’s why when Larisa jokingly says, “You didn’t really ask me to get married!”, I always answer: I did. Even at the moment when he proposed to rent an apartment together. It meant: together forever. (Smiles.)
Larisa:
-...And until death do us part! (Laugh.)
– And yet, what does “didn’t really ask for marriage” mean?
Larisa:
- Everything was, of course. But somehow unconventional and quite funny.
Here we go with wedding ring Same. Sasha ordered it himself, and for some reason two days before the wedding he decided that a fitting was needed. I say: “Okay! But only so that I don’t see anything.” And as I remember now: I extended my hand over his shoulder - I was sitting in the front seat of the taxi, and he was in the back.
And... the ring doesn't fit!
Of course, there was no time to redo it. And my mother, using the money that had been put aside for an apartment (by that time the default of the nineties had just eaten it up), bought me a ring, with which we went to the registry office.
True, it should be noted: Sasha remade it to my taste - stones and white gold appeared in it. By the way, I also wore my first “Thumbelina ring” for a long time – on my little finger.
But I still love the joke “I didn’t ask you to marry me, I didn’t give you a ring, I didn’t ask for children.” (Laughs.)
– Tell me honestly, did you fall in love with each other for your sense of humor?
Larisa:
- Including!
But, to be honest, Sashka has always been a handsome, prominent guy. Athletic and tall. It made an impression!
I always thought: “Lord, if only I wouldn’t fall in love with a meter with a cap! We’re daring to mice!” (Laughs.)
Jokes aside, I was captivated by the fact that Sasha is a man not of words, but of actions. I think this is how a man should be: active. Not a buffoon.
Alexander:
– The fact is that Larisa and I complement each other. She is choleric - temperamental, emotional, sensitive. And I try to react to everything calmly and, as far as possible, judiciously. Larisa jokes: “Sanya, you will live forever, because you have no nervous system". This is not true, of course, but I restrain myself to maintain balance. (Smiles.)
– Do you support Larisa in her creative development?
Alexander:
– It seems to me that at home Larisa needs not a crazy fan of her work who knows all the songs by heart, but good husband and dad, who can always get a mammoth for the family...
Larisa:
- And buy juice!
– Larisa, does Alexander help you in everyday life?
Larisa:
– When Sasha suggested living together, I couldn’t find anything better than to answer: “Then you wash the dishes!”
Alexander:
- It wasn’t like that! I don't remember this!
Larisa:
- So I remind you. Constantly. (Laughs.)
This is what I mean: dishes are still Sasha’s sacred duty in those moments when the dishwasher does not perform it. And he cooks very tasty! He can find an interesting, original recipe and cook some masterpiece on his own.
- And there are no stumbling blocks - neither in everyday life, nor in relationships?
Larisa:
- It doesn’t happen that way, of course.
There is one thing that I cannot understand and accept. We should come to terms with it and just live with it, but this doesn’t always work out.
Sasha can never warn me about his plans, or rather, that they are changing. And I start to beat myself up.
He might fall asleep before I return late from the performance. But if I don’t know where he is and what’s happening to him, no.
Alexander:
– In my defense, I can only say one thing: this is how a reluctance to disturb loved one. And not at all indifference, as it might seem.
– Do you have any differences in raising children, Alisa and Arseny?
Larisa:
- Well, everything is as it should be: Sasha is a good policeman, and I am a bad one. For example, children can’t go to bed, even though it’s high time. I say: “Sasha, at least shout at them for the sake of decency!” But where is it?
Alexander:
– You’re just better at it! (Laughs.)
Larisa:
- On the other hand, Sasha has his own methods of education. He communicates with children as equals. According to the principle: as you are to me, so am I to you. Did you offend dad? Don't expect ice cream from him! And you know: it happens to be very effective!
Alexander:
- That's right. A mother in a family is boundless love. And dad is a model of behavior that sons adopt and daughters look for in their future husbands...
– Your family will soon celebrate a small age for a person, but a big one for a couple – 20 years together. How did you cope with the notorious relationship crises in years 3 and 7?
Larisa:
– You know, we never marked on the calendar the days when not everything went smoothly in our relationship. But of course there were such days.
And compromises helped to cope with them. The ability to understand and accept.
Despite my emotionality, I can’t imagine what it would be like to throw a show scandal at my husband and defiantly put his suitcase on the staircase. And it’s not even that this is not a female method... It’s just humanly wrong.
Alexander:
- That's right. We also leave each other personal space. Larisa meets with her friends, for example, and I go to volleyball with my friends. We respect each other's freedom. We can spend time in our circle, but we always strive to go home!
– Is this the happy secret of your family?
Larisa:
– Our secret is love. Nowadays you can often hear the phrase “build relationships” on the screen... So: funny! Without love you can't build anything. It is she who is the foundation on which everything rests.
And so that this foundation does not crumble over time, you need to wait for your person.
2009 became a landmark year for you in a sense. Is that so?
This is true. Many people say that 33 years is quite a serious date for a person. First of all, this date is beautiful and significant. In addition, this year marks the fifteenth anniversary of my creative activity. I started as an artist-vocalist at the Syabry studio with my brother. Before that, we tried writing with composer Gena Markevich: we recorded about five tracks that were significant for us at that time. But now, looking at my achievements, I understand that I have become more professional.
Have you done any analysis of how these 15 years have gone for you? Without going into too much detail, can you tell us about some milestones in your work?
We can say that since 1990 I started walking career ladder called "show business". There was no pop music then - there was pop singers, and the music was called "popular variety".
Was this your first step?
Yes. I studied in Minsk music school No. 150, where the most excellent teachers taught. Music was taught until the 9th grade, and then general education subjects were taught.
After 9th grade, I tried to enter the Institute of Culture, but, unfortunately, I was unlucky: I failed an essay on the works of Bogdanovich. But I still returned to Bogdanovich: Igor Luchenok invited me to perform at his creative evening, where I performed the song “Veronica” with the Presidential Orchestra of the Republic of Belarus under the direction of Viktor Babarikin. Many people then discouraged me from singing it, but I was so imbued with the poetry and music that I put my whole soul and myself into this song.
After "Veronica" there was a pause in the Palace of the Republic. I thought that I sang poorly, but then the audience in the hall began to applaud so much that with this applause I was literally carried off stage.
Is applause really nourishing?
It’s not just applause that nourishes. It feeds the energy of people, their perception of my creativity. It is important to properly tune in to the wave of the concert, and it does not matter whether it is a solo concert or an assortment concert. Emotions should be positive, romantic, and should concern each of those people who come to the hall.
Just a month and a half ago I performed at the stadium in Gomel at the City Festival, which attracted about 10 thousand spectators. This is an absolutely amazing feeling: the power and breath of the orchestra itself, the energy of the music - all this is very significant for the artist and helps him hold the viewer with his emotions.
How do you prepare yourself for a performance? You somehow calm yourself down, drink valerian...
I'm incredibly worried. Every artist who takes his work responsibly is very excited about his performance.
You've been on stage for fifteen years and still worry?
Unfortunately or fortunately, this is true. In my opinion, if an artist stops worrying, the meaning of his work is lost. You should expect to meet the audience with trepidation and excitement, because you don’t know how they are in the mood. Maybe there is someone angry in the hall and he is expressing his emotions with some wrong words. And this happens in life.
Are they shouting something negative?
It was a long time ago. Thank God, over the past five years I hardly remember such incidents. I'm lucky for the viewer.
Do you have to sing along to a soundtrack? Surely on some television projects soundtrack is used...
Necessarily.
Which performance do you prefer?
I like a quality performance. It can mean either a positive phonogram or a minus one. It is clear that the whole world is moving towards live performances live music. But in our country it is very difficult to do this, since such a performance is very expensive, and a lot of money is needed to support the team.
Our show business and Russian show business are generally incomparable concepts. Russian show business is a huge machine for making money, an entire industry of artists, shows, and entertainment. All this ultimately pays huge dividends.
The average annual budget of a Russian artist is about one and a half million dollars - we don’t invest in artists in such volumes: the main investments come from the artists themselves or from producers.
As far as we know, you were one of the first Belarusians on the “New Wave”.
Not one of the first, but the first.
Was participation in this competition some kind of stepping stone for you or was it some kind of audition?
These were not just tests, these were personal ambitions - mine and my friend Kirill Sheleg, who at that time represented the Mystery of Sound company in Belarus. We became very good friends and are still friends to this day. He is always in the music business, aware of all the new products and competitions. It was he who recommended “New Wave” to me.
The first album "Answer Me Why" was very successful in Belarus. After that, I had to somehow assert myself.
It was flattering for me to be the first Belarusian on “New Wave”. I tried to get into this competition for two years in a row.
The first time I was prevented by certain circumstances, but I am not one of those people who stops halfway. In the second year I prepared better, and in May 2005 the organizers of the competition called me and said that I had made it to the finals. You can’t imagine how I screamed with joy at that moment!
Are you satisfied with the results of this competition?
For the first time, I was incredibly pleased: I became a laureate, they knew about me, they heard about me. Most people after my arrival in Minsk said that I represented my country with dignity. On the second and third days I performed great. The first day was quite possibly a little rough: I had no experience working in competitive programs.
Competition is a huge psychological and emotional stress. The Russians came with psychologists, with a serious group of producers, directors, assistants, nannies - with everyone they could. At that time, unfortunately, I was unable to obtain information support from anyone. Already at the venue of the competition, I was provided with information support by the ONT TV channel and the Unistar radio station.
That is, there were still people who supported you.
They supported me directly on the spot. And this was already quite good and very pleasant: the ONT badge warmed me. For Unistar, I was like a freelance correspondent: they called me from the radio station and we went live with reports.
Besides the fact that this competition has become something for you psychological stage, can we say that participation in the “New Wave” was with the expectation of leaving, for example, for Russia?
Quite possibly: after the competition I spent about eight months on a plane between Minsk and Moscow.
You then participated in “Saturday Evening” and in some other projects...
I participated in projects such as " People's Artist", "The Secret of Success". It was a pretty good start for me.
Thanks to the New Wave?
Yes, thanks to the contacts I made at this competition. Then I met the brilliant producer of musicals Ekaterina von Gechmen-Waldeck (METRO). She is a magnificent person, a musician, a magnificent woman who does not leave indifferent those people to whom she paid attention. Then she helped me contact Joseph Prigozhin, with whom we entered into a contract. Unfortunately, this contract did not produce any significant results, so we terminated it. But to this day we remain colleagues and support good relationship. I am very pleased that a person with that name calmly reacted to my proposal to terminate our agreement.
What didn't work out? Why didn't it work out? business relations with Prigogine?
In no way do I regard this as inaction on the part of Joseph Igorevich, no. There is a musical and creative tandem called “Valeria-Joseph Prigogine”. I am very kind to these people and to Valeria directly.
That is, in order to support Valeria at the same level, she needs to give all her time?
Yes, sure. Maybe Prigozhin would like to work with someone else, but he simply doesn’t have the time. I understand him completely and completely, and I think that in his place I would have acted exactly the same.
What other results did these Russian “campaigns” of yours bring?
First of all, such “hikes” are an internal strengthening and, of course, acquaintances: I am friends with many Russian artists younger generation.
Do you go to corporate events in Moscow?
I went, but now I only go to Moscow to record vocals with Andrei Slonchinsky, with whom we continue our cooperation. This is a great author wonderful person, with whom we have been cooperating for a long time - since 2005.
I would like to know about your attitude towards Belarusian show business. Inna Afanasyeva once said the phrase: “In Belarus, there may be a show, but there is no business.” And many believe that Belarusian performers today cannot offer a quality show. How do you assess Belarusian show business?
If I am here, it means that show business is present, it exists and is developing.
When I came from abroad in 2003, I needed to somehow declare myself. I approached the issue of business as an American: I began to research the market to see if it was unoccupied, and it turned out that it was completely free. I have found a great niche as a romantic singer who sings about love.
Who are your listeners?
The target audience can be from 12 years old to 55-60 years old, as I was convinced of last concerts. Of course, the main viewer and listener is under 45 years old.
Are you stirring up interest in yourself?
Certainly. Participation in various shows on television channels is an integral part of producing artists, this is promotion. You must always be visible, you must be featured in good programs, in morning and entertainment shows, on radio stations. In principle, communicating with me is what fuels interest in yourself. I don’t resort to scandals in any way - I’m not that kind of person.
What about taking a photo, for example, with Paul McCartney, as some people do?
I wonder who could do this?
As it turned out later, no one.
Like this. I don’t like to deceive the viewer - it’s not in my rules. It's better to be honest and present your feelings from the stage. Being, for example, in a nightclub, you can have fun. But why make a “strawberry”, attract close attention to your person? I don't see the point in this. I already get more than enough attention, and I’m incredibly happy about that. Many people say: “Oh, Lord! I’m so tired of people paying attention to me, pointing fingers at me.” Rejoice, artist, that they point a finger at you and pay attention, because there is meaning in what you do. When you are noticed, when you are told that you are doing something well or badly, then you are on the right path.
Do they say “bad” to you?
One day a girl came up and said: “I like you, but I don’t listen to your music. I listen to Manson.”
What did you answer her?
I told her: “Everyone has their own taste.” And he smiled.
Like Leopold the cat.
A smile always relaxes even the most evil people.
You come across as a confident person. Are you always confident in yourself?
I am always confident in myself, even when I am very worried. I am an artist at my core. If you are not sure that you were born to be an artist and should be on stage, there is nothing for you to do there.
Were you initially sure that you were born an artist?
I was sure of this back in school: when I took the exam, I sang a song about Cheburashka. I sang and cried. I sang and cried because I felt sorry for Cheburashka, who had no friends, and then that crocodile appeared in life. I showed with my emotions that I am a very sensitive guy.
Are you still emotional?
To this day! I can’t even watch the news: if there are any tragedies shown on TV, I immediately turn it off. I begin to tremble internally - it’s scary what’s happening around me.
Let's get back to show business. You said that it is not developing as rapidly as we would like. What, in your opinion, is missing for this development to proceed more intensively?
Unfortunately, I’m not an expert in this yet, although I entered college at the Faculty of Arts.
How many times have we reproached Lesha Khlestov for being an uneducated guy. And now Lesha Khlestov is a full-time student at the ISZ, he is a future producer, he goes to lectures... Are you skipping school, by the way?
No. In any case, I try not to play truant. Now, however, serious preparations are underway for New Year's musicals, which will be filmed on various TV channels. Naturally, the time has been reduced, but I try not to miss lectures and be at almost every one. It is clear that this is not always possible. But I will still take tests on the topics that I missed.
You say that you are not yet as connoisseur of show business as you would like...
I don’t know what hinders the development of show business: maybe a lack of global shows or outside investment. I would like to say that we not only have artists, but to say that we can create a global show that can surpass any Russian one.
No money?
If you are doing a show for one artist, planning the choreography correctly, and making scenery on stage, you need huge amounts of money. An analogy can be drawn with the Robbie Williams Swing concert, which took place at the Royal Albert Hall with a magnificent orchestra. Every time I watch this concert on video, I can imagine how the people felt inside this hall! They were direct participants in this concert. And look at Mylene Farmer’s concerts: this is not just a theatrical production, this is a whole cosmic show!
Unfortunately, we do not have such opportunities. Are there any talents?
There is plenty of talent, believe me. Not only that Belarusian land fertile, and also wonderful people: creativity grows with every generation.
Tell me, is 75% mandatory? Belarusian music Did they personally help you on the air of radio stations?
I was lucky: I became popular up to 75%, so I have nothing to blame.
How do you feel about the statement that thanks to this 75%, a stream of low-quality material poured onto the stage?
Unfortunately, I will support this opinion, since there is large share truth. Many people decided that they could do whatever they wanted, they could record a song in the kitchen and take it to the radio station. And if they don’t accept her there, you can write a complaint. Unfortunately, radio stations suffered as advertisers disappeared. While people got used to it, while musicians adapted to the need to select high-quality music and the right songs, time passed.
And Khlestov is refused at radio stations? At least sometimes?
Apparently I was lucky. Since 2003 I have been delivering or sending out my tracks personally. I call the radio station myself and offer to bring or send my recording.
Why are you doing this yourself?
This is a kind of respect for those radio stations that believed in me in 2003. While hitting the thresholds, I found several people who understood me and believed that I could become the first.
Judging by our communication, you are not a star at all. A star fever did you have?
Probably it was in 1993-94. It was a teenage star fever that I suffered for, in my opinion, half an hour. Now there can be no star fever: every day you need to work more and more. Thanks to the crisis, we realized that we need to work even harder, that everything in this life is not so easy. And this motivates us not just to take action, but to do hard labor.
Does Khlestov make quality music?
I'm saying that the creative team that works with me makes more than high-quality music at the level of the former USSR.
What does a quality piece of music mean to you?
There must be a beautiful, memorable melody. The artist must be talented, charismatic, follow appearance, must be able to behave appropriately on stage in accordance with the type of music he performs. Poems don't have to be stupid. In my second album “Because I Love” every word is carefully measured. Pavel Bertosh, Dima Manzhura are those people who work wonderfully.
How do you know that this or that composition will “take off”?
In the first album we worked with the creative tandem of Maxim Oleinikov, Vitalik Chadyuk, Vadim Fomich, Vitalik Penzin. Then I relied on the opinion of my wife: she is a classical vocalist. But my wife said that there should be only one person in the family to sing, and she preferred that I should do it. She helps me a lot and creatively, and in terms of family support.
She also says that some thing will play?
She is my partner, and not only in the family, but also in business.
Is it possible to make good money in Belarusian show business?
I won’t say it’s very good, but it can be good.
During the day, I received questions from listeners, which I now invite you to answer: “Lesha, I would like to know a little more about your family.” By the way, when you got married, some of your fans didn’t disappear?
What has disappeared! They congratulated me all over the Internet forum! My fan club knows when it’s my wedding anniversary, they congratulate me and send me text messages. There are no fewer fans in any way, they just matured. But to this day they are my army: in different cities there are small representative offices of our fan clubs, which help very seriously.
What, for example?
For example, I have a promotion going on with specific customer, with whom we travel around cities. Fans gather their girlfriends and friends and come out with posters. After the concerts, I definitely go to them, take pictures, position myself as a friend, because this is the army of fans that always helps. They give me their votes in the charts and I thank them very much for that. I really appreciate it.
Let's now talk about the family.
I have been married since 2005, my son is already four years old, and I have a daughter from my first marriage. I have great children. My daughter is eight years old, she studies at the same music school where I studied. Just a week ago I was at a concert, dedicated to the Day mother, who taught the class where Polina is studying. I was so pleased!
Doesn't creativity interfere with the family, and does the family interfere with creativity? Or are these things complementary?
It is very important, especially for an artist, musician, painter, to find your other half. I'm very lucky. My wife understands me: she knew who she was marrying, she knew what it entailed. She worries every day, but knows that work is the main thing for me.
"What place does sport occupy in your life?"
Sport takes a secondary or even tertiary role after work. I do physical education, at one time I was fond of sailing and quite successfully.
How do you relax? Is sport a type of active recreation?
No, sport is one of the types of keeping yourself in physical shape. Looking at Oleg Gazmanov, since 2005 I have been doing physical activity quite diligently under the constant supervision of my instructor and good friend Kirill Dorofeev. He makes sure I look good.
How are you resting?
I am relaxing outside the city with my family in a village house in the Vitebsk region. I like to go fishing, wander through the forest, and be close to nature.
"Do you read books?"
You are truly confident in yourself. Did you have any complexes, for example, about being short? Or did you outgrow all this in childhood?
As a child I took this very seriously, I don’t even know why. Apparently, in my childhood, most of my enemies tried to tease me about my only problem - my height. As a child, I really loved to stand up for myself and even bullied high school students. I didn’t count to two: I immediately jumped on a person and defended my position even with people who were two classes older than me. I got bumps, there were black eyes under my eyes - all this was like everyone else in adolescence.
And then I realized the advantages of being small: I am unique and exclusive.
There are journalists who try to tease me. I look and think: “And this person studied at the institute? And this person positions himself as the most educated?” In one of the programs I was asked the question: “How do you feel about the fact that you are short? Where do you dress - in” Children's world"?" And this is a question from a journalist? Is this a normal question? The person is deliberately trying to humiliate me. I don’t pay attention to such things: maybe this person is narrow-minded, maybe he’s angry at life, and at that moment he felt better.
What should I do? How to answer this?
Are you ever weak? Can you afford it?
I can with a child. With a child I become unarmed.
Are you a good father?
My son will grow up, we will ask together - it will be more correct. My wife says I'm a good father. Perhaps I’m good emotionally, but in terms of the time I spend with my family and child, of course, I’m not very good. I think he will grow up and understand why I work, and I work for my family and loved ones: for my mom, for my dad, for my brother, a great artist.
I always wanted to ask, have you ever had any rivalry with your brother?
It wasn’t much, but we acted very smartly with each other: we found a middle ground with him that only truly dear people can find. We decided to be cool, great brothers rather than really bad colleagues. And it works.
“What new things are you excited about in the near future?”
My new track will be released soon. It will be romance again, love again - the theme of love will never dry up. If Shakespeare were alive, he would write about love.
What achievements in your life do you consider the most significant?
I consider the most significant thing to be who I became - the artist Alexei Khlestov. Of course, my most important achievements are yet to come. Family is very important to me - it means a lot to me. I value my creative group that works with me. I have very tender feelings as professionals for Andrei Slonchinsky, Pavel Bertosh, Pavel Pashkovsky, Lilya Kamlyuk, Sasha Soloveichik. Sasha - unique person: I was amazed that a 16-year-old girl had such great potential, expression and interest in work.
Do you have any recipe for how not to forget about creativity and family, but to create their harmonious coexistence?
The most important thing is to be a person, a positive person, who will not alienate those around him.
Alexey Khlestov was born on April 23, 1976 in Minsk into a working-class family. “My father, as he said, loved to sing yard songs with a guitar on a bench under the house. My mother also took part in amateur performances at school. That is, they had musical inclinations, but they could not realize them at that time,” says Alexey.
Alexey's abilities manifested themselves early - in kindergarten It was he who was always asked to sing at matinees. Then his mother, Lyudmila Nikiforovna, took him to a school with a musical bias, which was located nearby. The establishment was prestigious, and therefore they took it there based on a competition. “I sang a tearful song about Cheburashka, cried and sympathized with him that he had no friends. I couldn’t understand how this was so,” recalls Alexey. A few days later he was enrolled in the piano class.
However, the first to realize the innate musical abilities The eldest son Andrei, who is also known to the general public, started in the Khlestov family. When Alexey was ten, he sang in VIA “Rovesnik”, a popular children’s group at that time. “I finished nine grades and decided to enter music school, but because of the concerts I didn’t have time to submit the documents,” he says. “As a result, I entered a regular vocational school.” But he didn't give up music.
In 1993, at the second republican competition of young performers in Minsk, Alexey received a prize audience choice. Then he tried to enroll again - this time at the Institute of Culture. I passed vocals with flying colors, but failed Belarusian literature. The lack of theoretical education was replaced by extensive practice. First, participation in the “Slavic Bazaar” (hit the top ten), and then three years of work in the “Syabry” studio. At one time he also performed in a duet with his brother Andrey.
At the end of 1996, Alexey Khlestov went to work in the East, to Bahrain, where he spent six years intermittently. However, this could not continue forever. In February 2003, Alexey once again visited Minsk: “I decided to take a closer look at what was happening here. I listened, looked... I tested the market, one might say... and recorded the first song “Forget You”, with which I starred in “Hit Moment”. She dialed large number votes, enjoyed success on the radio and then I realized that I needed to work further.”
Then hits began to appear one after another, thanks to which Alexey became the most rotated Belarusian performer of 2003. On December 19, 2003, Alexey Khlestov’s debut album “Answer Me Why” was released on West Records, which included hits and still unknown songs.
On January 29, in one of the capital’s registry offices, Alexey Khlestov officially formalized his relationship with his beloved girl Elena.
His first solo concert was sold out in the small hall of the Palace of the Republic (November 24, 2004), then a tour of the cities of Belarus plus participation in a tour with the Presidential Orchestra of the Republic of Belarus (March-April 2005), which ended with a large solo concert in the Palace Republic (April 29, 2005), which already gathered a full Great Hall!
In March 2005, Alexei Khlestov’s concert tour with the program “Answer Me Why” was a success in the cities of Belarus.
And while waiting for the second disc, Alexey pleased his fans with the maxi-single “Burst into the Sky”, released in April 2005, which included songs already loved by the public, such as “It didn’t come true”, “Nothing happened”, 2 versions of the song “ Burst into the sky" and a duet recorded with the popular Belarusian group“Pull-Push” - “Ocean of the Taiga”. The presentation of the single took place on May 3, 2005 at the Mystery of Sound store on Nemiga.
In the summer of 2005, he took part in the competition of young performers, which took place from July 27 to 29 in Jurmala - he became the FIRST Belarusian participant International festival young popular music performers " New wave-2005". After which he took part in the Russian television projects “The Secret of Success” (RTR channel), “Saturday Evening” (RTR channel). And for the New Year's Light of the ONT channel, a duet with Alexey Glyzin “Winter Garden” was recorded.
On April 23, at the capital's Coliseum club, Alexey Khlestov celebrated his anniversary on a grand scale! Friends, colleagues, and numerous fans came to congratulate the birthday boy. The party was also attended by Moscow composer Andrei Slonichinsky, with whom Alexey fruitfully collaborates in lately. But perhaps the most shocking and unexpected gift for Alexey was a certificate for naming a celestial body, donated by fans. This means that since April 23, 2006, one of the stars in the constellation Taurus bears the name of Alexei Khlestov!
On May 30, 2007, the solo concert of Alexei Khlestov “Because I Love” was held at the Palace of the Republic with a full house, accompanied by the Presidential Orchestra of the Republic of Belarus.
In July 2007, at the International Arts Festival “Slavic Bazaar in Vitebsk 2007,” Alexey Khlestov took part in five concerts, which is a kind of record for any performer. Also within the framework of " Slavic Bazaar“The international premiere of the duet song “Two Stars” took place, which Alexey Khlestov performed together with his young Russian actress and singer Lena Knyazeva.
In October 2007, Khlestov performed in Rostov-on-Don and Taganrog as part of the International Festival of the Parliamentary Assembly of the Union of Belarus and Russia. In Rostov-on-Don, Alexey was awarded an honorary diploma “For Creative Achievements.”
Alexey Khlestov is currently one of the most toured and rotated Belarusian performers: his songs have been at the top of television and radio charts for five years.
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Once, in one of the posters in the newspaper, we published an announcement: “Concert of A. Khlestov.” After the concert, a perplexed reader called the editorial office: “You wrote that there will be a concert. I come, and the wrong Khlestov is there. Similar, but definitely not the same.” We started our conversation with the question of confusion.
- Does this happen often?
Alexey:- Not often, but it happens. If we just can’t convince the concert organizers that there are two of us, A. Khlestovs, so we need to write on the posters full name, what can we say about ordinary viewers. Each of us has our own viewer, so in case of confusion there are some who are dissatisfied, this is understandable.
- Do you have any grudges against each other? Disputes on the topic “who is more popular”?
Andrey: - No. We are brothers, what grievances? Lesha is a great guy, he worked in Bahrain for seven years, earned money, and invested in himself. He made himself popular, I respect him for that. I also achieved everything myself, only it was at a different time, then there were other opportunities. I was about 13 years old when I learned to play the guitar and went to sing at the VIA “Rovesnik”, it was at the Palace of Pioneers in the Frunzensky district. We traveled a lot through the Komsomol Central Committee to all sorts of concerts, we even went to Germany and performed in front of Soviet troops. Then I sang in amateur performances at a vocational school. I took first place in a competition among creative youth like me, and I was invited to join the Red Stars ensemble.
- What kind of vocational school did you graduate from?
Metalworkers' school, trained as a repairman. True, two weeks of practice at the Vavilov plant is all the experience.
Alexey: - We are from a simple working-class family, both from peteushniks. Dad worked as a builder, mom was a computer operator, worked at big cars- “Robotronach” - in “Belbytsnab”. Then computerization came and it was reduced. Dad now works as a machine operator at the Krupskaya meat processing plant, and mom is retired. And after the 9th grade, the head teacher politely asked me to leave school, and I went to vocational school No. 148, so by profession I am an electrician of power lighting equipment. I haven’t worked a day, and, thank God, people have light. Somehow the lights went out in my apartment, so I didn’t know where the traffic jams were, I sat without light for two hours until my dad arrived. How did I study? He sang more than he sat in class. At the age of 13, Andrei brought me to the same ensemble “Rovesnik”, at first I played bass guitar there, then sang. As I remember now - “The old mill, spinning and spinning...”. I never thought that in the future I would communicate with the author himself, Igor Nikolaev.
And so I repeated Andrei’s path. I went with “Rovesnik” to all sorts of competitions, we were filmed in various programs, then there were a lot of them on BT. I remember the very first filming was in Bobruisk for the “Night Rendezvous” program. I opened both branches. “Hey, you sleds” was the first song, and the second was performed with Andrey - “We are different.” And after they sang it, he went behind the stage and fainted from excitement.
-Are you different?
Alexey:- Actually, yes. We are both Taurus, but I am April and was born in the year of the Dragon. And Andrey is a May, and was born in the year of the Dog. He is soft-spoken and sometimes has a quick temper. If I lose my temper, I’ll have forgotten by the evening, but he might be offended for a week. He loves to work, but is sometimes lazy. Sorry, Andrey, I'm telling the truth.
Andrey:- Lately we just don’t see each other much, so he can say that I’m lazy, he doesn’t know how much I work. Lesha has a difficult character. He's stubborn. Otherwise, he's a normal guy. As a child, of course, I freaked out when they left me in charge of a nanny; we are six years apart. But all brothers and sisters go through this.
- Why didn’t you go to universities?
Andrey:- I haven't tried it. After vocational school, I joined the army, ended up in Osipovichi, in the missile forces. He sang there too. It turned out funny: I was fired, and two weeks later they called: “The ensemble is coming to film the television, we can’t do it without you, go back to the army.” I had to put on my uniform and go to the army for an encore. And then there were competitions in Jurmala, in Vitebsk, somehow everything started to spin and that’s it, I’m working.
Alexey:- And I tried to enter the Institute of Culture, I even went to preparatory courses. I failed the presentation on Belarusian literature, they wrote according to Bogdanovich. And now there is no time to study. If there were 50 hours a day, I would do it, only in a different place. I would receive an economic or legal education.
- Do you live in your own apartments or rent?
Alexey:- I'm filming.
Andrey:- I live with a girl, this is her apartment. The girl’s name is Nastya Shevtsova, she sings in “Ternitsa”, we have been together for four years.
- Are there any children?
Andrey:- I have two from two previous marriages. Son Nikita is 12 years old, daughter Kristina is 8. Nastya and I have not had children yet, she only recently graduated from college with honors, now she can become a mother.
Alexey:- I don’t discuss this topic (as far as we know, Alexey has a child from his first marriage. And three weeks ago, when Alexey was in Jurmala and preparing for the “New Wave” competition, his son Artem was born in Minsk. – Author’s note .).
- Which of you got married first?
Andrey:- What time? I got married for the first time at 22 years old. We lived for a month and a half.
Alexey:- Sometimes, in order to understand that people are not suitable for each other, you need to not only live together, but get married. You become completely immersed in everyday life and understand that this is not your other half.
- Where did Lesha find his other half?
Alexey:- We met Lena in Bahrain, she also sang there. She will not return to the stage, we decided so - there should be only one person in the family to sing.
- Didn’t you take Andrey with you to Bahrain?
Andrey:- He called me, and I was about to go, but such trips take a long time to prepare, something didn’t work out. I breathed a sigh of relief and that was it.
Alexey:- I don’t regret that I went. It was exhausting work, singing live for six hours a day, 30 days off during Ramadan, when not a single nightclub is open. But I gained irreplaceable experience. Learned English.
- Did you earn any money?
Alexey:- Do you know this joke?
The musician is asked:
- How are you?
- Everything is fine, I released the disc.
- So what, did you sell it?
- Yes, I sold - a car, a dacha, an apartment...
To make singing on stage your job, you have to be either insanely rich or just crazy. I'm going through a crazy phase.
Andrey:- And I somehow fell behind life. I don’t even have a computer, I don’t know what the Internet is. I'm glad that when I walk down the street, people recognize me and invite me to speak.
For the final interview of the joint project LADY and the school English language EnglishPapa “Star Dads” we met with Alexey Khlestov and his family.
The current time is not easy for Belarusian artists, admits Alexey. But he found a way out for himself: to work hard and productively. That is why it is easier to catch Alexey at rehearsals and concerts than to see him at home. All for the sake of creative impulses? “Yes and no,” he replies. Alexey is the father of three children: a son and two daughters, one of whom is from his first marriage. Raising and providing for them is a creative task, of course, but also an incredibly responsible one. She does not tolerate searching and debt-based self-determination: you need to live and work here and now, for your family and yourself.
In an interview with LADY, Alexey explained what he fears in raising children, how he reconciles his son and daughter, and what he chooses in the “family-work” dilemma.
- Alexey, you are the father of three children - practically the standard of demographic policy in Belarus. Have you ever imagined yourself as a father of many children?
“It seems to me that no one thinks about this.” This is what happened in this life. Is three already a large family? — Alexey clarifies to his wife.
“Yes, but to a greater extent this applies to one family, as I understand it,” Elena prompts.
- Doesn't matter. Accept this reality,” Alexey jokes. — The main thing is to take care of the family, of the children, to watch them grow, develop, and achieve their goals. If there is an opportunity to help them, you will have to do it. And you will help, because your children are the best. This is a fact for any parent. It doesn't matter what success. Even the smallest ones, but these are the achievements of your children.
— What kind of family did you grow up in?
- Mom, dad, me and my older brother. We were, of course, missing someone. Sisters, for example. In childhood, the more children, the better. Then they find it faster common language. Although this is not quite the case with our children. Artem is now 11, Varka will turn 5 in November. The age gap between them is a little large, so they conflict and compete over who will receive more attention from their parents. Of course, for dad, daughters are gentle; sons have a harsher upbringing. Still, the boys are more hooligan. Although girls too. Varya is such a fidget.
— Is there anything that you adopted from your parents into your current family?
- I can’t even answer right away. We are still different generations, people from different times. Our parents lived in Soviet years, and then they had their own foundations and interests. We are more advanced. And our children are the indigo generation. They will probably have the following traditions: sit down at the table, take out gadgets, write SMS to the person sitting next to them.
“But you probably wouldn’t want this to happen to your children.”
- Of course not. But I don’t know how it will happen. Time is running ahead of the rest of the planet. Electronic inventions can change everything. But I don't want this. I want to be with people, among them, to enjoy communication.
What did I take from my family? Don't know. We create our own traditions.
“Our parents had no time for us, they were busy with work,” Alexei’s husband Elena helps answer the question.
- Yes, they left in the morning and came at night. It probably happened to everyone.
— You, too, are always at work, creative. Aren't you afraid of repetition?
- Yes, but I have free time. And I try to always be at home on Sunday. We get together, have dinner, and allow ourselves quite a lot of food. Sunday is family day. Sunday pizza is what brings the family together.
This is our little tradition. I tell the manager not to be deployed anywhere that day and to stay with my family. Because in weekdays Varya at our gymnastics and in theater studio, Artem - in the gymnasium, at football, before that he went to tennis. They study a lot, and both one and the second child have practically no free time. From morning to evening they are passionate about something. Lena works as a mother, a teacher, and a wife. Controls who has learned what. Tough work, I must admit.
— Children of different sexes are sometimes a problem and a conflict, especially if there is some age difference between them. You yourself mentioned that this applies to your family to some extent. How do you divide your attention for them, try to reconcile them, teach them not to compete?
— In our family, such situations happen from time to time. It happens that they stand for each other, Artem shows the character of an older brother, a protector.
“But mostly children constantly swear, fight, and don’t find a common language. Although on the other hand, they cannot live without each other. If you separate them and send them to grandma, they will be bored,” admits Elena.
— In any family, two children mean fights. I also fought with my older brother, what are we talking about. They blamed each other for who had beaten what. This is child survival.
— They say that one child in a family is an egoist, two are rivals, three are a team. Have you thought about starting a team and balancing things out?
“Lena, let’s go create a team,” Alexey says ironically. - They probably say it for a reason. I think so. One is bored, there is no competition, all the laurels, as well as the blows, go to you, there is no one to push anything onto. Two children fight for attention, for all the best. The more children there are, the more friendly they grow. Space is becoming smaller, and compromises must be sought. Maybe we can create a team. Let's see. Now times are so difficult.
— Family and children for you as an artist - was it an anchor that kept you afloat, but held you back in new endeavors, or an impulse that gave you movement forward?
- The family cannot be an anchor. The foundation for everything - yes, driving force- no doubt. You need to move forward to be a support, an example for children, a perspective. Everything that is happening now, for which you work, strive, is dedicated to family.
— For example, you need to go to a concert in Slutsk, and one of the children is very ill. What will you choose?
- If there is a dilemma, then naturally I will choose my relatives. This is a fact. But, thank God, there have not yet been situations where radical decisions need to be made. Although if, God forbid, this happens, the family will come first immediately. And you can come to Slutsk next time, apologize, explain the problem. And I'm more than sure that people will understand. The Belarusian people are very understanding.
- Your Artem is in sixth grade, that is, a little more - and he is on the verge of adolescence. Are you preparing for this?
“Now children are starting to grow up earlier. Processes move faster. You look at your son at 11 years old and see him as a teenager already. She makes herself known periodically,” says Elena.
— How do you try to extinguish these explosions?
- Let Lena tell you here. She encounters this more often.
- He’s both rude and rude. Not so much, but you can already hear notes that you have never heard before. Scary. But for now we're just talking.
— He goes on principle because of some completely incomprehensible things. Youthful maximalism. In many ways, he tries to establish himself, even if he is wrong. Like “this is my rake, let me step on it.”
— It’s not so bright yet, but if we talk more often, then, in principle, maybe it will bypass us. You need to start communicating with him more. I scold Artem more often, but dad, on the contrary, feels sorry for him. We need to change.
“There must be a bad cop and a good one in a family.”
“We need to change, I’m already tired,” Elena insists.
— You, Alexey, mentioned a conditional rake. Making mistakes yourself is more effective than learning from someone else's words. Will you allow your children to step on this rake and won’t you take care of them?
- Of course, we will warn, but this does not mean that Artem will react like this: “Okay, parents, I listened to you, I will not step on them.” This process is inevitable. We ourselves were like that in childhood, everything is the same - continuity of generations. One way or another, you yourself must understand that this is bad. Of course, the coolest thing is to learn from other people's mistakes. But again, you can't tell if it was good or bad. “The guys told me that this shouldn’t be done. Hmm, how?" When you get hit, one hundred percent you won’t repeat the mistake after that.
“It would be nice, of course, if children were so developed and understood what you were telling them, perceived it and did it.” But this will most likely not happen. No matter how genetic memory is preserved, Elena argues. — Naturally, with each generation, children become different and develop with the whole world. We weren't what they are now.
“For example, our Artyom, after all his busy work, has a little time left to run outside and walk for an hour. What about us? Although I studied at a school with a musical bias, I was involved in sailing, but I was not a boy who was in classes from morning to evening.
- Why then are you trying to create such employment for your children with just a little leeway? Is this the interest of Artem and Varya themselves?
— Nowadays there are a lot of temptations for teenagers. You can be influenced different people who will teach bad things. But I want my son to do something useful. Here you need to take care of it. There is an opportunity - you need to load it. Both physically and creatively. Every girl and boy needs physical activity not only in physical education lessons. Thank God, Artem really likes it, he goes to football with great pleasure.
— What is Varya interested in at her age?
“This can hardly be called Varya’s hobby.” It is clear that my mother gave it to me and my mother drives it. When we came to the gym, Varya was not yet 4 years old. At first she may not have really liked it, but then her daughter said: “I’m interested!” Now he walks with pleasure. Before this we tried to study in ballet school, but it turned out not to my liking. While we are doing gymnastics. We’ll see what happens in the future,” Elena thinks.
— Varya loves the stage. She took part in several concerts. It was a huge event for her,” adds Alexey.
“We’ll see in what direction this will develop.” But, of course, I want to give a lot of opportunities. So that later, at a more conscious age, they can choose what is important and interesting to them. In general, it is not clear where to send the child. It seems like you have a talent for music and sports, but what to do with them?..
— What values do you, as parents, want to pass on to your children — son and daughter?
- Treat yourself, each other, and others with respect. This is the main rule of life. It will be easier for you if you treat people kindly. I always teach Artem: what you do to a person will come back to you. I build my upbringing on this principle,” says Elena.
— Varya is a girl who finds the key to almost any person. She is cheerful and open, Artem is more reserved. You're always drawing perfect life. What it will really be like, no one knows.
“We will only find out whether we will make good educators when the children grow up and become parents themselves.” Only then will we be able to evaluate ourselves.
— Alexey, aren’t you afraid of missing out on something because you’re so busy?
“You can’t imagine how afraid I am.” Believe me, any parent is not immune from this, no matter how busy they are. Still, there is a serif in my head that reminds me. I spend a lot of time traveling and performing at concerts. Lena helps, tells where and what you need to pay more attention to. That’s what a family is meant to do, to help, guide, and hear in time. I would like not to pass by a single achievement. Believe me, every parent has a complex in their head - not to miss something.
“Personally, I’m afraid of missing out on talent in a child,” Elena answers, “I want to guide him correctly so that he grows up and does what he loves.” And so that he has incredible abilities for this matter.
— So that our child makes the right choice, loves his profession, is successful in it, finds a family and friends. Our mission as parents is to educate, raise and see that everything works out.
— If we return to more mundane things: what are your responsibilities at home as a dad? Can you be seen, for example, when you are picking Varya up from the garden or preparing breakfast for everyone?
- Yes, if I have to, I’ll take Varya. I take Artem to school. My wife wakes up every morning at 6.30 am.
— There doesn’t seem to be such a clear division. Although, for example, taking him to the hospital is Lesha’s responsibility.
- Yes, I’m worried, I immediately drop everything and run. Lena looks at this more calmly. Recently Artem had a leg injury. He fell off his bike and injured his knee, in my opinion, very badly. I took off and got lucky. The doctor said: “It’s right that they did this.”
— Lesha is more scrupulous in matters children's health. I take it easier.
- Yes, we are such men.
“You’re so special,” Elena convinces her husband.
— As for household issues, I do everything that needs to be done. I can iron, sweep, and wash the floors.
“He really likes to wash dishes in the dishwasher,” Elena jokes with her husband.
- I can do almost anything. It’s difficult to hang a TV. I'm afraid of everything that drills and chisels. It's not mine. Driving a nail is not for me, sharpening knives is not for me.
— Alexey, can you remember the most vivid impression of your childhood?
— Trip to North Caucasus with mom. We walked a lot in the mountains. Magnificent nature! I was in first grade. Mountain rivers, Nalchik, Pyatigorsk. These were vivid impressions. But one time I really impressed my mother. We were on some mountain. A beam stuck out over the abyss. I walked along it and sat down at the end. I can’t imagine what my mother felt at that moment. I am ashamed of this action. But the trip itself was unforgettable.
— Have you and your family already traveled somewhere together?
- It's my fault that it doesn't. We are just planning. Everyone has visas. I would like to take them to big park entertainment in Germany.
— We went to the seaside, but I would like to go somewhere else where it would be interesting for children. Yes, for my husband and me. We are planning to go to Munich during the holidays. Now if you miss a week of school, it’s impossible to catch up later. There is so much information there that you can’t keep up.
- Can you remember yourself before your family and compare with who you are now - a husband and father of three children? How have you changed?
- When you are without a family, you are in search. You're flighty. When you find a family, you find a purpose with it. That is, you understand: you have responsibility. You must decide. Ghouls, frivolity, creative impulse and the so-called search disappear. Sedateness appears. You have already found everything you were looking for. Now we need to build a family like a Swiss clockwork: work accurately and for a long time. This means that then you made the right choice and found a person with whom you started a family and everything is fine with you.