The desire to find differences in the extraordinary similarity of mentality makes me constantly compare the behavior and habits of Russians and French for many years. Arriving for the first time in Paris in 2001, as a tourist, I was stunned by the absolute freedom of behavior of the French students whom I met on the very first day. These youth seemed to me the embodiment of the Russian dream, from which the strict collar of rules had been removed.
Since then, a lot has changed: the pressure of the Soviet framework was forgotten, the fever of the 90s passed, Russian youth became almost as free. I have not been a tourist for a long time, and every day, with curiosity, I discover something new in this amazing people, which is so similar to us, but continues to surprise, delight, outrage and ardently interest Russian people again and again since the time of Yaroslav the Wise. So what is so special about you, French gentlemen?
8 out of 10 French people prefer to buy on sales
The first thing that catches the eye of every tourist in Paris is the absolute indifference of ordinary Parisians to their appearance. That is, to some special, own style of clothing (not counting office wear), which would be thought out to the smallest detail, carefully selected and serve as a source of pride for its owner. An extremely small part of French society cares about what they wear to the theater or exhibition. Only a few receptions and official events with a strict dress code can boast an exquisitely dressed audience. For Russians who build a cult of presentable appearance, this manner of dressing causes, to put it mildly, bewilderment and forces one to pay attention to the second feature that runs counter to Moscow everyday life - the accessibility of French elite quarters and establishments.
In Paris, you will not feel like a little boy who is about to be grabbed by the ear by a teacher when you go into an insanely expensive restaurant to drink coffee in jeans or bump into a French film actor in the company of a couple of long-legged beauties at the entrance to a Louis Vuitton boutique, just looking there So, look at the prices.
Of course, in France you won’t be able to buy yourself a Ferrari for the price of a bottle of milk, but, for example, jeans in a Parisian store will get you almost nothing compared to shopping centers Moscow, not to mention the period of sales and stock of famous brands at half price. And none of the French women will turn their nose dissatisfied: “Hey, that’s cheap!”
The French are used to saving. This is normal, this is accepted. Since the Great French Revolution, since the French cut off the heads of almost all their kings, ministers and their mistresses, it has become indecent to have a lot of money and power. No, of course, many have both, but they carefully hide it.
A simple French millionaire 12 years ago touched me with a wrinkled jacket and a gift teddy bear for 10 euros at the 2002 World Motor Show, where he incidentally bought himself a Jaguar. And the handsome Nicolas Sarkozy, while still the mayor of Neuilly-sur-Seine, energetically shook my hand (as well as the rest of those present) at the Impressionist exhibition, where he “went out to the people” to prove to everyone that he was “like everyone else.”
French cult of politeness
After the gloomy faces of Moscow, it is surprising and unusual to see how everyone in France smiles at you. When meeting eyes in the subway, it is not customary to look away; here you need to smile. Just like Little Raccoon to the one sitting in the pond. Otherwise, your behavior will be regarded as rudeness. And be sure that they will smile back at you.
Even in a crowd, even if it was not you, but someone hit you with an elbow or the hem of your cloak, you must immediately apologize. "Pardon" is the most commonly spoken word in France. Questions of politeness are equated to questions of norms of behavior and morality. If you forget to insert s’il vous plait (you’re welcome) after each phrase, you may simply not get an answer. At the very least, you can’t count on a positive solution to the issue. That is why Russians, not accustomed to constantly smiling and apologizing, have gained the reputation of being ill-mannered in France.
But, despite the fact that communication manners are hammered into the heads of the French from infancy, in the overwhelming majority of cases it is total hypocrisy. Don't flatter yourself if they smile at you. Smiles are simply a norm of behavior and an addition to the office dress code. If they don’t call you back within the next 3 days, then most likely this won’t happen at all. Not answering at all if you have nothing to say is quite French.
True, there is one feature for which even these annoying manners can be forgiven - the French almost always work honestly. Very rarely does a real Frenchman violate given word. If you only knew how easy it becomes to live when you don’t have to read things with a magnifying glass. smallest font postscripts to contracts, when you can simply leave a check as a deposit, securing a promise not to cash it until the final transaction, when you can simply agree and trust.
France - the land of holidays
The French do not like to exert themselves; complex multi-step moves are not for them, which is why they live so long. Time has been kind to the descendants of Dumas and Balzac, allowing many to celebrate their 100th anniversaries. No one is in a hurry here. In terms of the amount of non-working time, France is even ahead of Spain.
You won't find 24-hour shops in France. On Sunday the city completely freezes in anticipation of Monday. Only a few Arab shops sell their goods of dubious quality at exorbitant prices until 1 am on weekends and holidays.
Do you know what it means to “make a bridge” in French? This has nothing to do with bridge construction. It’s just that if a holiday falls on, say, Thursday or Tuesday, the French “forgive” themselves the missing working day between the holiday and the weekend. Nobody cares about working it out, as is customary in Russia. And this one is charming school system vacations every 1.5 months, thanks to which those who can afford it vacation with their children 5 times a year! By the way, in France all schoolchildren and preschoolers have additional admission on Wednesdays.
It is also very interesting that religious holidays, along with historical dates and the New Year, are also public days off in France, and they are celebrated much more magnificently. For example, Christmas (December 25) is celebrated with the same scope and spirit as the New Year in Russia.
In France, life flows smoothly and measuredly. In order to find out some question, you must first call, or better yet, go to the desired organization to set a time and place for your visit. You are then sent an email confirming the appointment. And only then can you ask the question that interests you by attending the event planned in this way. By the way, like nowhere else, in France it is customary to conduct all business through regular paper mail.
Paris – Moscow: coffee and chocolate
Paris and Moscow. From the very beginning of my acquaintance with France, I involuntarily compare them. What is the secret of the almost mystical attraction of these two capitals of the most mutually indifferent countries in the world? How are the residents of the two cosmopolitan cities similar and different?
Almost every third resident from the “outback” dreams of conquering each capital; in France, this also applies to the French Union ( former colonies). Two dream cities, literally overloaded with emigrants and migrants. Two pearls of architectural and cultural heritage. Even geographically, the western and southern districts of Moscow and Paris are considered the most prestigious for living.
And they are completely different. Like coffee and chocolate. Even if you prefer tea, you will certainly appreciate the incomparable, bitter taste of freshly ground fine Italian roasted coffee. I associate the bewitching aroma and awakening effect of this drink with Moscow. The scorching, invigorating rhythm of this city, slightly softened by the creamy foam of luxury, is necessary to wake up and go, run forward and upward!
What about chocolate? Of course, you can do without it. Of course, you have sufficient willpower to deny yourself this most tender, melting pleasure that plunges you into nirvana. You know for sure that there are more useful things than this enveloping pleasure, which begins to ache sweetly somewhere under your heart. This is Paris. Where no one is in a hurry. Where time gently flows around you, barely touching you with gentle fingers... Coffee and chocolate. Can be done separately. But how amazing they are together!
The French are a reserved people, they are reasonable and prudent. They are very friendly and polite, they will never tell you the truth to your face, although the French do not like other nations: they consider the British arrogant and boring, Americans - greedy and hypocritical, Russians - ill-mannered.
Most French people do not like speaking English, so if you do not know French, it is better to immediately say that you are from our country. It is best to contact the police with questions about navigation. It is not customary to disturb a person by phone after 21.00; for a business conversation, it is better to call the office.
Throughout the country, a lunch break (siesta) is accepted from 13.00 to 16.00. At this time, all institutions, banks and shops are closed. Visiting churches during lunch breaks and worship services is not permitted.
Most museums are open only in the first half of the day. Monday is a day off for museums.
Traditionally, lunch for the French starts at 20.00, so if you are invited to lunch, know that you are expected at this time. After lunch, cheese is served for dessert, and several varieties at once. You can wash down cheese only with red wine, and in no case with juice or Coca-Cola. Keep this in mind when ordering dessert, even in a modest restaurant.
In Paris, it is customary to tip everywhere: in a taxi, at a gas station, in restaurants, bars - usually 10% of the order. In Catholic churches and cathedrals they usually speak in a whisper; it is not customary to express one’s emotions noisily; in some cathedrals they may make a remark.
HOLIDAYS
January 1 ( New Year), March 30 and 31 (Easter Monday), May 1 (Labor Day), May 8 (Victory Day), May 19 (Ascension Day), July 14 (French Revolution Day), August 15 (Assumption), October 1 (All Day Saints), November 11 (Victory Day 1918), December 25 (Christmas).
CULTURAL LIFE
Switch to 35 hour working week occurred relatively recently, and it is difficult to judge its influence on the leisure of the French. However, it can be stated that more and more space is being given to leisure and cultural recreation in the family budget.
According to statistics, there is a short period in the summer when sea beaches France consistently attracts the largest number of holidaymakers. They even came up with a name for it - “blue vacation”. But the same statistics claim that about a million French people also relax in winter, going to places where the sky and sea are blue all year round. And some acquire their own villas there.
"Fest noz" means "night festival". Fest noz traces its origins to small village gatherings, when villagers gathered together after a long day of work, usually in the open air, to relax and socialize. At such meetings people sang, danced, told stories, etc. Of course, it would not have happened without drinks and snacks. Nowadays, the festival of noz is very popular not only in villages, but also in the cities of Brittany. It is held only at night or late in the evening and continues until dawn. Imagine a semi-dark hall (a bright hall, a completely dark hall, an open area, etc.). There are musicians on stage, and it can be just two singers or a band with electric guitars, drums and everything else. As soon as the music starts, almost all the people in the hall (and there may be several hundred of them) join hands and start dancing. A huge snake of people holding hands moves through the hall to measured, rhythmic music. This dance meditation brings together people of all ages and all social status and has gained such massive popularity in Brittany that there is a whole layer of musicians who play only for fest noz.
FOOD PRODUCTS
Typically, the French buy groceries once a week, and every day they buy only bread or the famous bagels (croissants). As for vegetables and fruits, many Parisians buy them at the market - there is more choice and better quality.
There are food supermarkets in all areas of the city, which differ in range and prices. But the largest selection of products and the most low prices- in giant supermarkets located outside the ring road. Parisians go there by car. The only thing that is not recommended to buy here is fruits and vegetables: they are far from being best quality, since they were selected for long-term storage in the store. But cheeses, sausages, canned food, cookies, coffee, soft and alcoholic drinks - all this is presented in dozens of options.
How do the French understand this abundance of products? They are based on two criteria: price-quality ratio and the thickness of their own wallet. Supermarkets have the most expensive products are placed on the top shelves, the cheapest ones are on the bottom. The price tags indicate in large numbers the price of one unit of the product in the package. All major stores have discounted products.
Meat products, minced meat, sausages, game, pates, etc., are sold in butcher shops. Some butcher shops have a sign at the end with a picture of a horse's head: they sell not only beef and lamb, but also horse meat. If you are buying a chicken, it is better to choose one that says “fermier” (meaning the chicken grew up on a farm).
Cheese stores have more choice than supermarkets. The French buy cheese here if they are expecting guests in the evening. Well, for themselves they will buy cheese in a regular supermarket. Please note: French people often open a box of cheese and feel it. This is how they determine how many days the cheese can be kept in the refrigerator. Let's say guests are coming on Saturday, and that means cheese bought on Wednesday should be hard to the touch. And by Saturday it will ripen and become soft.
In France there is no uniform closing hour for stores. Most shops are open from 9 to 19-30. The exception is sometimes small grocery stores on the outskirts of large cities or in villages.
French cuisine is conventionally divided into three parts: regional cuisine, widespread French cuisine and extremely refined cuisine, an example of which at one time was the court cuisine of the French kings. The conventionality of such a division is evident, for example, from the fact that if Burgundian meat in Paris is a regional dish, then in Burgundy itself it represents widespread French cuisine.
Regional French cuisine of the southern provinces (Provence, Languedoc, Basque region, Gascony) is sharply distinguished by spicy food and the extensive use of wine and spices in its preparation, especially garlic and onions. Alsatian cuisine also has its own characteristic features, characterized by its satiety and greater consumption of pork and cabbage. Residents of coastal areas use more seafood in their cuisine - fish, crabs, lobsters, lobsters, shrimp, etc.
The names of hundreds of dishes came to us from the French language: cutlets, sauce, mayonnaise, omelet, entrecote - all these are French words. But the French’s notorious love for frog meat is a clear exaggeration. Frog meat is indeed present in the rich range of dishes of French cuisine, but it cannot be called an everyday French dish. Grape snails with herbs and spices are somewhat more often eaten (of which there are sometimes so many that you can’t even distinguish the taste of the snail). And, of course, you can’t ignore wines and cheeses, of which there are as many in France as there are sandwiches in Denmark.
CLOTH
Paris is a trendsetter. The French dress elegantly and expensively. Special attention they pay attention to shoes. IN everyday life The French dress very simply - jeans, simple shoes, a sweater, there are no chic trips to the street or to work. A certain style of clothing may apply only to individual companies that set their own requirements for employees. There are a lot of tourists in Paris who dress simply and in general they dictate fashion. In expensive restaurants they require appropriate clothing, because people dressed simply will not be allowed in there. Breton peasant women dress in their own local fashion, which has nothing in common with the familiar European fashion. And it's just a few hours from Paris. Men wear trousers and wide-brimmed hats decorated with ribbons, and women wear elegantly embroidered velvet dresses, aprons and lace caps of all possible and impossible styles.
TRANSPORT
There are three types in Paris public transport: metro, buses and funicular. The same tickets are used for all specified modes of transport. The funicular will take you up one of the most beautiful hills in Paris - Montmartre.
The metro in Paris covers the city itself and its suburbs. Be careful not to leave the city. The Paris metro operates from 5:30 to 00:30 am. The Paris metro has only 14 lines. Paris metro stations are located 300 - 500 meters from each other, you can get to anywhere in the city in a matter of minutes.
To rent a car you must have an international license in French or English, a passport and a credit card. You must order a car 48 hours in advance. To rent a car in France, you must be over 20 years old and have a driving license with at least 1 year of driving experience. Insurance payment is required. You can rent a car at the airport. The rental amount does not include the cost of gasoline, as well as additional mileage fees. It's more profitable to pay by credit card than cash.
Buses - not so much fast transport, but it’s always nice to admire the streets of Paris once again. The bus has one undeniable advantage over the metro, which is very important for tourists: outside the window you see not the black wall of the tunnel, but city landscapes. So, if you are not in a hurry, it is better to take a bus. The total length of bus lines in Paris is 524 kilometers, the number bus stops- 1754, waiting time at the stop - from 4 to 20 minutes.
A light sign on the roof of the car will help you recognize a taxi. If the sign is lit, the taxi is available. Often to the left of the driver, outside, near the windshield, there is a meter with a flag. A raised flag indicates that the taxi is free, a lowered flag indicates that the taxi is busy. The toll is automatically marked by a meter. If you want to go somewhere in the vicinity of the city, we advise you to agree on payment in advance, since in this case you will also have to pay for the return trip to the city. It is customary for taxi drivers to tip 10% of the fare.
SPORT
Recently, the popularity of sports has been growing. There are approximately 10 million athletes who have been assigned ranks by sports federations: greatest number arresters in football and tennis. Judo, bowls, badminton and golf are becoming increasingly popular in recent years. Sports such as mountain biking, hiking, mountain climbing, parachute descents, and canoe-kayak are also becoming increasingly popular.
Men prefer football. But, if football is popular in all areas of France, then nowhere else in this country are men obsessed with rugby as much as in Brittany.
The French Alps are the most high mountains Western Europe, the world's largest center winter sports. The most popular resorts: Chamonix and Courchevel, Val d'Isere and Tignes in Val Thorens, Les Deux Alpes, La Pland, Megeve, Meribel, etc.
Source: www.chemodan.com.ua
French national character is in many ways the antipode of German in European culture: Maybe this is why the French and Germans have always understood each other poorly. The French are characterized by a constant admiration for “beautiful France”, the beautiful French language and culture. In the soul of every true Frenchman live complete sincere feeling Stendhal's words about “beautiful France”: “France is beautiful in spiritually, she surprised the world with her victories; this is a corner of the universe in which people’s relationships bring them less grief than anywhere else.” Therefore, the French highly value knowledge of the French people, their history and culture in political partners, and are flattered by the interest shown in their country.
France actively pursues a policy to strengthen, protect and disseminate the French language; it strongly supports La Francophonie, an international organization promoting the dissemination of the French language and culture in modern world. Everything related to the French language and culture is presented by the French in ideologically consistent and attractive packaging, like expensive cognac or perfume. Therefore, the French react with hostility to the use of English or German in the process of political communications, believing that this infringes on their sense of national dignity, and they prefer their own language. French diplomats like to quote Charles V about the peculiarities of French use foreign languages: “I speak Spanish with God, English with merchants, French with ladies, and German with my horse.”
The most important features of the French mentality are rationality, skepticism and materialism. French philosopher René Descartes expressed this in a succinct aphorism: “I think, therefore I am.” Reason is the ruler French life, so the French are not as easily carried away as they seem. For all their fiery and sparkling spirit, they are skeptics, and in politics this is expressed in a certain initial distrust of every new enterprise. The French do not immediately allow themselves to be convinced of the advisability of the political proposals being made. For them, arguments supported by facts, as well as political, economic or technical justifications are very important.
It should be remembered that it was the French who at one time raised materialism into a system: Holbach, La Mettrie and Condorcet were among the first to speak out in favor of the ideals of materialism and progress in science. Therefore, the French willingly believe only in real facts, statistics and sociology: in the conflict of faith and knowledge, they resolutely rebel against faith. The French consciousness is deeply atheistic: the incomprehensible and intangible are resolutely rejected by the French mind. In politics, they prefer a comprehensive discussion and careful argumentation of every detail. political problem. The French traditionally focus on logical proofs and great attention They pay attention to preliminary agreements: they do not like to immediately discuss the issue that interests them most, which is fundamentally different from the Americans. The latter, as we know, prefer to immediately and without delay resolve the most important political issues.
It is known that the French live in a culture of words, and the French politician, like no other, is a master of words, speeches, and rhetoric. He, as linguists say, “thinks from language.” The goal of his thought is perfect embossing in the word: language prescribes to thought the form in which it crystallizes. In this case, wordplay and aphorisms become a form of thought. The French remember that they are the heirs of Montaigne and Rabelais: the French mind is a sharp, freedom-loving, frondier, sparkling mind. Even in political rhetoric, no matter how cold and reasonable it may be, there is a note of slyness and Gallic humor.
It must be remembered that the French vocational training process is aimed not so much at mastering knowledge, but at mastering the language. France is distinguished by the severity of its language policy: here, already during the era of the Great French Revolution, a law was introduced according to which only literary language could be used throughout the country in official spheres. French; Minority languages and dialects had no rights. Therefore, a truly educated person in France is considered to be someone who is fluent in their native language. It is literature and the art of words that are the national calling of the French. Therefore, French politicians love to demonstrate their eloquence, strive to give extensive reports, and prefer open discussions and debates.
Highly valued in France legal right, a written law and a signed treaty, therefore the French attach great importance to the legal force of adopted political documents and their compliance with the spirit and letter of the law. At the same time, the fairness of the adopted political agreements is not an empty word for them. It is worth recalling that on the monument to the brotherhood in the French cemetery of Pere Lachaise, where outstanding figures of science and culture are buried, the words of Victor Hugo are engraved on marble: “The only thing we expect from the future, the only thing we want is justice.”
The French desire for standards and rules is also important in politics: they strive to have a carefully thought-out plan of political action and to provide for ways of political response to all occasions. French politicians do not like it when their partners suddenly introduce some previously unforeseen changes in the course of political negotiations. It is also necessary to take into account that in their political decisions the French are bound by a rather long process of approval “from above”, since bureaucratic red tape in France is objective reality. Decisions here are made by a limited number of high-ranking persons. The lower the level of political meetings, the more time it takes to agree on decisions.
Salvador de Madariaga showed a very witty difference between the French style in politics and the English one. The French usually say: “We have agreed general principles. So let’s sign the declaration in which they are formulated.” The British answer: “Yes, we agree on the principles. But why sign anything? The time will come to apply them, and we will act in the light of emerging circumstances. Since the principles are agreed upon, it will not be difficult to agree on specific actions.” After the negotiations, the Frenchman is tormented by bad feelings: “They don’t want to sign, which means they don’t believe in the principles.” The Englishman grumbles to himself with indignation: “They want to fasten me to their harness; It’s interesting to know what’s on their mind.” And here is the brilliant conclusion of a commentator on the negotiations: “It is quite possible to force the British and French to look each other in the eye. But the whole point is that their eyes are too different.”
Thus, the French consciousness trusts rules more than spontaneous impulses and instincts. In politics, it is important to take into account the large role that strong, long-standing connections and acquaintances play in France. Elite business and political world this country is very closed: “outsiders” are not allowed close, so recommendations are traditionally given importance. The French attach great importance to etiquette and rules of conduct; they are impeccably polite. The word politesse translated from French means a polished, smooth surface, the absence of roughness that interferes with the flow of life. But French politeness is an exclusively formal aspect of love for one's neighbor, the “gospel of good treatment.”
Russian psychologists point out that the French and Russians in the process of political communications are united by the desire for the warmth of informal communication, intolerance of the German “iciness of feelings,” sincerity and the desire for justice. Along with politeness, the spirit of competition is highly developed in French political culture: for a Frenchman it is always important to stand out among others, not only with business, political success or wealth, but also with gallantry and refinement of manners. At political events, this manifests itself in a very peculiar way: on the one hand, the French love to debate, often interrupt their partners, make critical remarks, generally prefer a confrontational type of interaction, but at the same time they strive to maintain traditional French courtesy, politeness, courtesy, a penchant for jokes and ease in communication.
The French do not hide their love for the joys of life. Michel Montaigne expressed the worldly wisdom of the French in a laconic phrase: “My art and my profession is to live.” The first place in the French consciousness is occupied by the right to life, and not to work, as in Germany. That's why many French people prefer important decisions accept not only at the table of political negotiations, but also at the dinner table, they love to host receptions and have fun.
For all its love for life, French skepticism never completely allows one to dissolve in life's pleasures. The French look at life a little from the outside, see it as a game and play it willingly. As the French writer Françoise Sagan subtly noted, this is precisely the secret of the French art of living. In French character for all his ostentatious love of life there is only “a little sun in the cold water”
Ecology of life. People: On the Internet you can find a million and more texts about “Russian” wives abroad - the readers and authors of these articles love to exaggerate all the subtleties and differences between “our” women and foreigners. But I have always been interested in the topic of men – “ours” and those with whom we go abroad.
Relationships in an international couple are very often like a litmus test: people from the same country could never make such interesting discoveries about each other as those two who were born and raised in completely different cultural and social environments.
On the Internet you can find a million and more texts about “Russian” wives abroad - the readers and authors of these articles love to exaggerate all the subtleties and differences between “our” women and foreigners. But I have always been interested in the topic of men – “ours” and those with whom we go abroad.
What exactly are they bribing us with? What do they have that they don’t? great guys from hometown and home country? After all, when it comes to Slavic women, it’s easy to immediately draw a picture in your head of how economical and caring we are, which is not surprising, since we were raised in a patriarchal society.
It is for these virtues that Europeans love us, living side by side with independent, emancipated women. But when you start talking about French men, nothing but clichés comes to mind: wine-savvy, romantic, wonderful lovers, flighty, fickle, stingy, arrogant. How much of this is true? And what are they like in their relationships with us - not French women at all?
I became interested just enough that I asked 50 women from Ukraine, Russia and Belarus who dated/were married to Frenchmen about it. The age range of respondents was from 22 to 57 years. Everyone is very different, which is immediately felt by the answers to the 10 questions I compiled. Today I am publishing the first 5.
WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE IN YOUR ATTITUDE TOWARDS A WOMAN THAT IS IMMEDIATELY NOTICEABLE?
It was no coincidence that I asked this question first, because it brings out the most emotional moments that lie on the surface. And my expectations were justified: 90% of the answers boiled down to the fact that The French perceive a woman, first of all, as an equal partner in a relationship, and not as the mistress of the house. Specifically, the word “equality” was mentioned in every second answer. A woman is perceived as an individual, they respect her, strive to make her happy, take care of her, without praising her like a princess or worshiping her.
But in some answers there was also bitterness about this very issue: that there is no clearly defined gender attitude that we are used to at home, where women are given flowers on the eighth of March, let go ahead and at the same time every day they expect a hot dinner, a tidy house, ironed shirts and so on.
The French, as it turned out, do not have this consumer attitude towards their partner - she is not a laundress, not a cook, and raising children is also not part of some purely “female” responsibilities. The French are accustomed to dividing all of the above into two.
A double-edged sword and a certain everyday pun: in our homeland we don’t like that all household responsibilities are assigned to us by default, but when we marry a foreigner, we voluntarily take on something that no one forces us to do.
WHO PAYS THE BILL AT THE RESTAURANT?
I don’t know why everyone is so interested in this, but this is a very popular question when it comes to French boyfriends. In fact, from the very beginning of meeting my boyfriend, I have been constantly haunted by some legend about the stinginess of the French, which has not yet justified itself. After four years of relationship, I am inclined to think that the European habit of buying less is often mistaken for stinginess. So, about restaurants.
In addition, some girls expressed quite frankly that they do not understand at all when something happens differently. At the same time, the French do not like it when a woman takes it for granted that he pays for everything - returning to issues of equality, this is more than logical.
All other answers to the question say “50/50”, “we pay in turns” or “the one who invites pays”. I specifically do not share the answers of those who are married or simply dating a Frenchman - in both cases the situation is approximately the same. I personally really liked the remark that some added to the answer: they say that the French are pleased if sometimes a woman pays the bill - they perceive this as a sign of attentiveness and love. And I fully support them in this.
DO THE FRENCH GIVE FLOWERS?
Another level of eternal disputes, and more often - simply complaints from our women that Europeans do not give them as gifts. There is a dual impression here: on the one hand, there is a culture of magnificent flower shops, of which there are a great many everywhere in France, the sale of fresh flowers in food markets, in supermarkets, and the obvious demand for the product itself.
On the other hand, there are a lot of stories about how the French don’t give flowers. Only six women out of fifty respondents said that their men give flowers often, without reason and without reminders. The rest of the answers boiled down to either the concrete “never” or “only if you hint.” AND separate category“I managed to get used to the bouquet on March 8.”
The fact is that the French (both men and women) very often buy flowers for home just like that. Not as a gift, not for a special occasion, but just to decorate the house. They are taken in armfuls at the market - along with fresh vegetables, meat and cheese. They don’t make events out of bouquets here, as we are used to.
That's why they don't give it any importance. And that’s why our women are so attracted to it. This is an addition to European equality, when you can quite safely buy flowers not even for yourself, but at home on an ordinary weekday - to please everyone who lives there. In our country, for now, the bouquet is assigned the role of a festive attribute and a sign of attention specifically to the woman.
HOW DEMANDING ARE THE FRENCH ABOUT APPEARANCE?
We all know that French women are often said to be not beautiful, but stylish and with charm. And about the Slavs - what are they? beautiful women in the world. And it’s not even the natural beauty itself that is amazing, but the amount of effort (money and time) we put into our appearance.
Which, again, is rooted in a patriarchal society, where everything revolves around a man - his choice, evaluation and approval. French women are much more freedom-loving and independent in this regard - they put their own interests above. What do French men value more in this state of affairs? Exterior or internal content?
Many women in their answers emphasized that the French are much less demanding in matters of beauty and grooming than their compatriots (already spoiled, it must be admitted). Of course, there are no fools - anyone is pleased when a woman next to her takes care of herself and knows how to highlight the best in her appearance, but this is perceived only as a pleasant addition to character and education.
But here the French have quite high standards: they love to talk about art, politics, literature, music - their companion should be able to carry on a conversation on any of these topics. Women's intelligence, erudition, and broad outlook delight them. But too bright makeup and overly revealing outfits are more likely to scare them off - charisma and non-flashy sexuality attract them much more.
I especially liked the comment of one of the respondents: “Be a better version of yourself,” that’s what a Frenchman wants from a woman. At the same time, men who take care of themselves expect the same from their partner. Unfortunately, for us this trend works exactly the opposite: no matter how good our woman looks, this will not guarantee that our man next to her will strive to look up to par.
SLAVYANKI VS. FRENCH WOMEN – WHOSE BENEFIT IS THE COMPARISON?
No matter how much women flirt and dissemble, in an international couple, partners always draw parallels and compare (at least mentally) their halves: we involuntarily put the French in a row with our ex-boyfriends who remained in their homeland, and our French notice the difference between us and their former or hypothetical passions.
Personally, I was a little upset by the answers to this question. Not even the answers themselves, but the fact that our greatest advantage in the eyes of the French is thriftiness and the desire to please a man. They call French women cold, self-centered, too demanding, pretentious, too independent and emancipated (it’s interesting how quickly men got tired of emancipation if French women were only allowed to vote in 1944).
Slavic women look like angels against their background - gentle, attentive, caring, masterfully lead their everyday life, cook, dress up and try for a man, put on family values at the forefront and (to quote one of the respondents) “satisfied with little.”
I often notice that Slavic women seem to feel sorry for the “poor, unfortunate French” who are tired of all these independent feminists. And the survey confirmed this impression. While European women are fighting for equal rights, our women continue to cultivate the dominant role of men.
IN in a certain sense this slows down the development of civilization. And it is not surprising that a Frenchman, “tired of emancipation,” choosing between two women, will choose the one who is not only rich inner world, but also culinary skills, perfect manicure and hairstyle and a willingness to give in.
And everything would be fine, but this also has a small fly in the ointment for us: unlike French women who strive to emphasize individuality in their appearance, Slavic women follow standards - high heels, long hair, red lipstick and so on. And this catches the eye of local men. That is, it turns out that we are somehow even too good for them.
While I was processing fifty answers to my questions, many vivid dialogues took place between me and my Frenchman, who also has something to compare with. It will be all the more interesting to publish the second part of this material, in which 50 women answered questions about their men’s attitude to sex on the first date, whether it’s true that the French are flighty and fickle, and something else. To be continued! published
The French mentality is mysterious and inexplicable. On the other hand, people all over the world for some reason are sure that they know the French well and know their value. The attitude towards them is twofold: they are considered proud, arrogant and narcissistic. Not in vain national symbol country - a rooster, a creature that admires only itself and hears only itself. But at the same time, very welcoming, hospitable and generous, people with good taste and who know how to get everything from life. Where is the golden mean, and does it exist? What are the features of the French mentality? Is it possible to talk about a unified French mentality, since the country is very heterogeneous in terms of national composition, and regional differences are striking even ordinary people, not like cultural experts.
How the French mentality was formed
France is a country with a very majestic and turbulent history. It experienced ups and downs, but almost always was at the center of the political and economic life of the whole world and Europe. The most grandiose event in the history of the country, which also forever changed the path of the entire civilization, was the Great french revolution. The famous slogan “Liberty, equality and fraternity” has since come to dominate the minds of millions of people and forced them to seek a better life for themselves and their children. Modern European liberalism is the child of that revolution. It is clear that the peculiarities of the French mentality could not help but depend on it. Therefore, one of the striking features of what constitutes the French mentality is the love of freedom, a certain amount of rebellion and anarchism. The Frenchman will not expect handouts from the state; he is used to taking everything that is due to him. This is also associated with active social and public position every French citizen, for whom the very concept of “citizen” sounds very meaningful.
France is a former empire whose borders extended far. Another feature of the modern French mentality is tolerance and tolerance towards all people, regardless of the color of their skin or social status. Multiculturalism is characteristic of France, perhaps more than any other European country.
French mentality: do we know it?